


The Light of Mana is The Radiance of Life

by raiaki



Category: Tales of Symphonia
Genre: Major Original Character(s), Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-07
Updated: 2016-11-10
Packaged: 2018-05-31 18:22:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 28,117
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6481750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/raiaki/pseuds/raiaki
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A man who loses all he has takes his own life. By some power beyond his control, he is reincarnated as a being in a magical world steeped in discrimination and laced with deception. He must fight the discrimination, help save the world, and perhaps find himself in the process - all while being plagued by confusing memories of a life he has never lived.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is slated to be pretty long. Also, it's not necessarily true that there will be no romantic pairings, they're just not set in stone as of yet. And even for those that are, I wouldn't want to spoil anything.

####  _Chicago, Present Day_

The young man did not want to die.

In fact, dying had been one of the greatest fears of his life. As a young child, he had researched whether scientists had yet found a path to immortality; as an adult, he despaired to find such methods himself.

Yet on the first day of October in 2015, at the age of only twenty-five, he sat on his cot, staring at the medical syringe in his shaking hand.

You see, even when seriously contemplating death – something he would never have seen himself doing before this week – he was still a coward. He'd decided to die, there was no possible better way out of this than to just die, and yet he couldn't stop his fingers from quaking like they were having an epileptic seizure. Or maybe they just wished he'd drop the syringe.

He didn't.

Slowly, painstakingly, but deliberately, he twitched his fingers so that the needle pressed against the visible vein in his left wrist. A bead of blood appeared on his pale skin, perfectly round, like a marble. He wondered at the deep crimson color. Was blood really supposed to look that way? In fact, the dark red against his now paper-white skin, coupled with the blue veins, made an oddly mesmerizing picture. Maybe he should take up painting.

His vision blurred, and he glanced at the syringe only to find it empty. When had he injected its contents? Well, no matter. That was what he had set out to do in the first place, was it not? Now he was drifting away…dying…

 _Dying._ In a moment of lucidity, his eyes jerked open and he remembered what had driven him to this. _Curse you, whoever created this miserable existence,_ he thought venomously.

Then the anger melted away. In the last moment before he drifted away, panic gripped him. _No. I take it back! I don't want to die. Please…save…_ But even as he thrust the silent words from his mind, they were swallowed up by an infinite darkness.

And all was still. …Too still, really. Wasn't he supposed to be dead? He still felt alive, just as if he was floating in space. He looked, but there was nothing to be seen; he tried to move, but it was as if he were disembodied. _Where am I?_ he tried to shout, but there was no method with which to make sound, no medium to transmit it, and nobody to hear it.

After what seemed like eternity staring at nothing, hearing nothing, feeling nothing, a time in which the man thought he must surely have gone utterly mad, a voice – no a presence – rang through his mind. _You dare take your own life,_ it said, but not in so many words. And he shivered at hearing it, although he did not know why.

 _Are you…_ he began tentatively, hoping that he… _it_ …could hear him.

_You have no need to know my identity. Just know that someone has seen fit to give you a chance to become a human being, to realize that the value of the world lies in more than your own success, your own knowledge, your own family. The world is not necessarily unfair or wrong because you feel you have personally been shortchanged. The world does not end when you die._

He became somewhat irate. _Who the hell are you, anyway? If you're just going to spout idealistic nonsense you can get out of my head._

The voice ignored him. _You'll be given one more chance before your fate is decided, in a world familiar to you, although not your own. You should be thankful for this. I personally think you don't deserve it, so I'd advise you to keep your mouth shut._

 _You –_ he began, but the voice overrode him once more.

_I have one last piece of advice. I don't know whether you will be able to remember your past once you are reborn, but if you do, do your best to forget it. Nothing good comes out of living in the past._

With that, the darkness exploded in a whirl of color. And the man as he was…was no more.

####  _Palmacosta_

Raine Sage, although only thirteen years old, thought of herself as a responsible adult, hardened to anything the world might throw at her. With good reason, she would argue. After all, she had been taking care of both herself and her baby brother Genis since she was eleven and he was only an infant. And everyone knew that half-elves mature quickly. But when she opened her door that morning to drop some books off at the academy and instead found a sleeping toddler at her feet, she had no idea what to think.

He was a small boy, appearing no more than two or three years old – about the same age as Genis – with hair as silver as Raine's and ears as pointed as an elf's. Despite his elfish appearance, however, Raine immediately sensed the odd mana signature that was the trademark of half-elves; not quite elf, yet not quite human. She gasped almost inaudibly, and then for once acted without thinking. She picked up the toddler in her arms, glancing around for any sign of his parents or other townspeople, and retreated back inside. In her distracted state she forgot about the loose floorboard near the door and almost tripped, noisily knocking over a chair.

"Raine...?" came Genis's sleepy voice, and Raine cursed inwardly, realizing she'd woken him. The two year-old tottered a bit unsteadily out of the room where they both slept, rubbing his eyes. Then he looked up at the other boy and his blue eyes became round. "Who?" he asked, wide awake now. Raine sighed resignedly.

"Genis," she began gently, "I found him outside. He is a half-elf, like us."

The little boy's eyes widened even further. He clapped a hand over his mouth, then looked all around the room as if he were afraid someone was hiding there and would overhear. "Really?" he said in a hushed and awed voice. He had never encountered another half-elf besides his sister. "So he'll be an elf with us?"

"Yes, Genis," Raine said softly, kneeling and placing the boy on the soft rug. "Remember, nobody can know that we are half-elves. All of us are full-blooded elves." She sat down next to him.

Genis nodded solemnly and immediately with the air of having heard the same thing many times before. Then his gaze brightened. "So will he be my new brother?"

Raine hesitated. She doubted that this young boy's parents would be coming back, considering that they had abandoned him so neatly on her doorstep. "Yes, he can be your brother," she said at last, smiling gently. It would be difficult to take care of yet another little boy, but she knew there was no way she could abandon a half-elf child who would be eschewed everywhere he went, or in the worst case – she shuddered – taken in by the Desians. She thought briefly back to the time when the Desians had tried to recruit her and Genis…

Genis's voice broke into her thoughts. "What's his name?" the boy asked earnestly, oblivious to his sister's disquiet. Raine glanced at the sleeping half-elf.

"I don't know," she admitted. "We will have to ask him when he wakes up. It seems someone may have put a sleeping spell on him."

Genis frowned. "That's not nice."

Raine smiled and ruffled her brother's hair. "It should wear off soon, but you're right; it's not," she agreed. "But we'll be his family now, okay Genis?"

"Okay!" Genis agreed happily. "I've always wanted a little brother!"

Just then, both half-elves heard the little boy stir and turned to look at him. His eyes opened and Raine noticed that they were green, which was not too unusual for a half-elf. He seemed to focus on Raine's face, and confusion crossed his expression. The boy sat up.

"Where's Father?" he asked, directing his question to Raine. Raine sat back in surprise. The reaction was not one she would have expected from a toddler who suddenly found himself without his family. He seemed very mature for his age, but she couldn't help thinking there was something else off about him.

"Who is your father?" she asked, carefully. "And can you tell me how old you are?" she added as an afterthought.

The boy blinked. "Everyone knows Father, and I'm four. Where is this?"

"You're in Palmacosta, a port town," Raine explained, watching his expression a little anxiously. "Do you know where your father lives?"

The boy stared at her for some time, as if thinking over what she had said. "Father couldn't tell me the location because it could compromise the safety of the organization," he recited dully, as if it were a sentence he had memorized. "He couldn't tell me his name either. That's sensitive information," he added, as if he thought Raine needed more explanation.

She was taken aback by this. "…I see," she said, at last, unsure of how to respond. She was about to continue, but the boy spoke again.

"This isn't where Father lives." It wasn't a question.

"…No, I don't think so," Raine agreed. Genis was listening intently, she noticed.

The boy closed his eyes, and for a second he looked like he might cry. The expression passed as he swallowed and seemed to make an effort. Then he said with a slight tremor in his voice, "Father said he might have to get me away. Some people there were bad. But he said people down here are bad too, if they know you're a half-elf." He opened his eyes and gave Raine a serious glance. "Do the bad people know you're a half-elf?"

Raine hid her surprise that such a young child could recognize her mana signature, filing away what he had said for future rumination. "No," she said slowly. "I'm an elf."

He nodded, unfazed. "That's right. I'll be an elf too, okay?" He paused. "Father said if I had to come down here, he might not be able to see me again. Will you take care of me?"

The more the child spoke, the more shocking his words were. Raine could hardly believe his calmness, but she answered immediately, "Yes, of course. Do you want to be Genis's new brother?" She put her hand on Genis's shoulder as she spoke.

The boy looked at Genis. "Hello," he said. "I'm Rai."

Genis grinned. "Hi!" he exclaimed. "I'm Genis and I'm two, so you're my big brother!"

Rai smiled.


	2. Trouble Begins

"By the way, Rai, where were you last night?"

Rai stiffened at his brother's cheerful query. How was it possible that Genis had noticed he was gone? He must have botched the sleeping spell somehow. Silently, he cursed his own ineptitude with magic. Although he could perform strong spells with enough practice, they had never come to him as effortlessly as they had to Genis, even though the other boy was a full two years younger than he was.

"…Rai? Hellllooo? Don't tell me you're off in your own little dream world again," Genis teased. Rai blinked and looked at him, remembering the question.

"Ah…nowhere," he said evasively. "Just needed some fresh air."

"If you say so," Genis said skeptically, but didn't press further. Rai massaged his temples. The younger boy knew him far too well.

Before the conversation could continue any further, Raine stood and rapped on her desk sharply with her fist. "It's time for class to start," she said sharply. "Now, has everyone –"

The rest of her words were drowned out as a gangly teenager dressed in red skidded around the corner, tripped head over heels, rolled spectacularly across the room, and crashed straight into Rai's desk, sending the small half-elf plummeting to the ground. Next to him, Genis snickered.

Rai scowled as he picked himself off the floor, dusting off his black clothes. The boy – Lloyd Irving, one of the most annoying people to grace the planet – got up as well, scratching the back of his head sheepishly. "Ah, Rai. Sorry about that. Are you alright?"

"No, I am certainly not all right," Rai said coldly. "I had a headache and you made it about ten times worse, not to mention completely derailing my train of thought –"

He was cut off by the sound of Raine clearing her throat sharply. "Rai," she said, her voice cracking like a whip, "There is no need to be rude. Lloyd has apologized, and you should accept the apology." Rai flinched at her tone, then looked back at Lloyd. Already the anger was starting to drain out of him. Why had he, a person who prided himself on his self-control, lost his temper so easily? Due to someone like Lloyd, no less.

"Apology accepted," he said stiffly. "I'm sorry for being rude, but I'd appreciate it if next time you didn't make an entrance by knocking me into the floorboards."

"Ah, yeah," Lloyd said, looking embarrassed. "I –"

"Yes, don't think you're off the hook either, Lloyd Irving," Raine interrupted, a steely glint in her eye as she thwacked the ruler she was holding into her left hand. "To the back. I thought I told you I don't tolerate lateness?"

Lloyd slumped his shoulders. "Yes, professor," he said, still sounding embarrassed as he trudged to the back. Rai almost snorted derisively, but managed to control himself at the last second. _Why_ was Lloyd able to rile him up so? Surely the mere fact that he was… _no_. Quickly, Rai cut off the dangerous line of thinking. He'd sworn to push that to the back of his mind.

He focused on Raine's lecture, refusing to think any more about Lloyd or… _that_. The older half-elf was waxing eloquent about the wonders of the Triet Ruins, the location of the first seal Colette would have to visit. He committed himself to taking notes on the properties of polycarbonate and its possible usages in magitechnology, which had long been lost to the world…

That was another thing. He had once lived in a world where there was magitechnology _everywhere_. It wasn't called magitechnology then, of course. He had a couple of theories about what his memories could mean, but none of them were very believable...

Not to mention the fact that _this_ world was…but…no. He shook his head. He was getting distracted again. He growled softly in frustration. Lloyd always did this to him. That useless idiot. The mere fact that he might possibly have such a relation with a buffoon like that made him irritable.

Rai pushed his unsettling thoughts to the back of his mind and directed his attention to the lecture.

* * *

Genis glanced up from his notes at his older brother. Rai was taking notes seemingly attentively, but his jaw was clenched and his leg was bouncing up and down rapidly in the way it always did when he was restless. He was obviously agitated about something – and Genis was pretty sure he knew what it was, too.

Ever since they'd moved to Iselia about five years ago – since Rai had first encountered Lloyd – he'd hated the other boy. Genis still couldn't fathom exactly _why_. It couldn't just be the fact that Lloyd acted like an idiot sometimes and didn't do well in school, although that was the reason Rai usually gave; Rai's dislike of Lloyd had started ever since he'd first _met_ him. Genis supposed his being best friends with Lloyd didn't much help either. Rai was probably somewhat jealous, since he'd been Genis's only friend before that. But _still_ , it wasn't enough to justify…

Well, puzzling over it wouldn't do any good. After all, he'd only thought about this like a _million_ times before this, Genis thought in annoyance. If only Rai would just tell him the truth. Obviously he knew something about Lloyd, or maybe Lloyd reminded him of someone…either way, it definitely wasn't as simple as he'd like people to believe.

He sighed. Despite that, he liked Rai. He looked up to his older brother – Rai was always sure of himself and could handle himself like an adult, almost like Raine. And he was really smart, too – so was Genis, but Rai was smart in a different way. Genis picked up concepts really fast and he could remember things really easily – and he read a lot – but Rai could just… _think_ really well. He could reason things out and come up with plans and just…he always seemed to make the most logical decision. Even though his magic had taken a little longer to take hold than Genis's had, Genis was still a little jealous.

He realized Raine must have asked him a question, because everyone was now staring at him. "Sorry, could you repeat the question?" he asked quickly. Raine looked at him in concern, and he sighed inwardly. She was probably thinking it was unlike him to be so distracted and now she'd be worrying about him and nagging at him all day. Raine could just be so… _Raine_ sometimes.

"I asked who Mithos was," she said. Genis smirked a little as he stood up. History was just so _easy_.

"Mithos, the hero, brought about the end of the Ancient War in the Holy Ground of Kharlan," he recited easily. Raine looked a little mollified.

"Correct. Afterwards, the hero formed a pact with the Goddess Martel to seal away the Desians who caused the war."

Genis heard Rai snort under his breath and glanced at his brother curiously. What was so funny about the history lesson?

Raine paused. "We'll end the history here for today, and finish up this lesson in a few days. After all, coming up is…"

"The Day of Prophecy," the class chorused before she could finish. Genis rolled his eyes. Yeah, she'd mentioned that only about a _thousand_ times…

"Yes," Raine said, satisfied. "Time for a math lesson. Genis, would you care to recite the quadratic equation?"

"Yes, Raine."

* * *

Lloyd yawned as the Professor worked some complicated math stuff on the blackboard. Math was just one thing he didn't see the point of. Even history was a bit better…after all, the Desians who caused the Ancient War were back, so knowing what happened in the past could be helpful.

Except, they _didn't_ really know what happened, Lloyd reminded himself. At least, they knew Mithos the Hero ended the war, but there weren't really any details as to _how_ he did that, or as to why the Desians were back now and causing everyone to suffer again. He had almost asked that question earlier, but had held back. He knew Rai and Genis would have poked fun at him. Genis he didn't mind so much, because he knew the elf didn't mean it. But Rai was a different story…

Lloyd sighed. He didn't want to think about Rai. He'd tried everything to be nice to him – he liked to get along with everyone – but the annoying guy just wouldn't go along with it! He wasn't sure what he could've done to make that kid hate him so much.

"Ow!" He awoke with a jolt, and realized that most of the classroom was empty. He must have dozed off. He looked up and saw that the Professor was standing in front of him. _She probably slapped me again_ , Lloyd thought ruefully. _Damn, she hits hard!_

"That was for sleeping through my class," she said sternly. "Now run along!"

He grinned sheepishly, running a finger through his hair. "Yes, Professor!"

Some things never changed.

* * *

"Lloyd!"

Colette ran up to her best friend. "So you finally woke up, huh?" she joked, giggling a little to cheer him up in case the Professor had hit him a little too hard.

"Yup," he replied, putting his hand on her shoulder. "Man, the Professor can really pack a punch!" He made a face.

Colette's expression fell. "Oh no! I'm sorry. Are you okay?"

Lloyd sighed. "You dork. Stop apologizing, I told you already!"

"Oh, yeah! I'm sorry!" She smiled and grabbed his hand. "Come on, let's go see where Genis is!" She knew mentioning Rai would put Lloyd in a bad mood. She didn't know why the two of them weren't friends, but she was sure it wasn't Lloyd's fault. Lloyd was the friendliest person she knew!

"Hey, Colette…" He sounded serious. Colette's heart sank a little. He was going to ask about…

"So you'll be starting off on your journey in just a few days, huh? Regenerating the world!"

"Y-yeah," she said quickly, trying to keep her voice even and happy-sounding. She didn't want to worry Lloyd. "I'm looking forward to it!" She giggled.

"I want to come, too," Lloyd said seriously. "To protect you!"

"Lloyd…" She just couldn't bring herself to say no and watch his face fall. But the journey was just too dangerous! And then there was what would happen at the end…

"I want you to come too! But I don't think Grandmother will allow it," she said apologetically. "So let's make every day count!" She smiled at him and continued walking.

_Lloyd…_ He didn't know anything that would happen, or what the world regeneration really meant. _I'm so sorry._

* * *

Genis glared at Rai. "I can't believe you could be so heartless! She'll _die_ if I don't help her!"

Rai looked back at him steadily. He felt bad that he was hurting Genis, but his little brother had to learn that life wasn't always fair or easy. "Genis, I told you not to go to the ranch in the first place. If you had just listened to me, this – "

"If I had listened to you, I would never have known how horribly they were treating Marble and everyone else!" Genis trembled and his eyes were filling with tears. Rai felt a pang.

"Look, Genis…" he said gently, trying to calm his brother. "I know how you feel. The people at the ranch are suffering. But there's really nothing we can –"

"No, you don't know how I feel!" Genis burst out, knocking Rai's hand away from him. "How can you be so…so cold? They're suffering and being treated horribly and being killed – and it's all because of half-elves like u-" He was muffled as Rai put a hand over his mouth.

"Quiet," Rai hissed. "Did you forget where we are? Were you really about to blurt it out in the middle of the village?! Who knows who might be listening?" He paused and took a breath. "Look," he snapped. "I'm not letting go of you until you've calmed down enough to stop blurting random things out at the top of your lungs! Calmed down yet?"

Genis nodded, still glaring at him. As soon as Rai let him go he took off running in the opposite direction. Rai sighed and slumped to the ground. That had gone completely awry. He had hoped to explain to Genis that if he were caught breaking the peace treaty, then even _more_ people would suffer, to try to get him to see reason, but the boy just wouldn't listen! He put his hand to his forehead and closed his eyes. He knew Genis was upset because fellow half-elves were the ones doing this, but that was irrelevant to the matter at hand. There was no point in risking their lives and the lives of the whole village for the sake of a handful of people at the ranch!

"Rai? What are you doing on the ground?" Colette's innocent voice floated up to him. He felt a flash of annoyance. Sometimes he thought the Chosen didn't have any sense whatsoever. Or maybe it was all just an act? …No, that was ridiculous.

"I'm fine," he said, getting to his feet slowly. "Why don't you go find your boyfriend? I would've thought you'd be with him exclusively today, seeing as you'll be leaving soon." Colette looked hurt and immediately he felt bad, but before he could say anything she burst into tears and dashed away. He stared after her, stunned. Had he really said something _that_ bad? Why was everyone all sensitive today, anyway?

Lloyd's voice sounded in the distance, rising in volume. "Rai! What did you do to Colette, you bastard?!"

Somehow, he had a feeling that things weren't going to get any better from here on out.

* * *

Late that night, Raine's blood ran cold as she realized she couldn't feel her brother's presence anywhere in the village.

Genis was gone.


	3. Half-Elves in Our Midst

Genis stormed quickly through the darkening forest – well, as quickly as was possible with legs as short as his. His kendama was ready in his hand in case he came across any monsters – he'd roast anything that tried to stop him! – but the night was oddly quiet. So he contented himself with furiously blasting fireballs every which way.

He couldn't believe Rai. At first when Rai had tried to discourage him from returning to see Marble, he'd thought it was just because he was afraid of the Desians, but now he wasn't so sure. Did Rai even _care_ about the suffering of all those people in the ranch? Marble was such a nice person, and even though those Desians were doing horrible things to her she still treated Genis so well and refused to give up living. And there were even little _kids_ at the ranch, even younger than Genis was! He clenched his fists. How could Rai possibly condone something like that?!

He stopped and collapsed next to a tree, burying his face in his hands. He remembered what Rai had started to say – "People are suffering, but there's nothing we can do." How could he say something like that so calmly? How could he, knowing that people were suffering, simply stand by and ignore it? Genis could never live like that!

He realized that subconsciously, his legs had carried him to the human ranch. Sighing, he stood and turned to go; there was no point in being here now. Marble would be locked up somewhere inside, probably asleep. Tomorrow he'd ask Lloyd to take him to the human ranch on his way home so that he could take Marble some food. He doubted the Desians even fed her at all. Those Desians were so…!

_But they're half-elves, just like me…_

Furious, Genis gave one last blast from his kendama, forgetting temporarily how close he was to the ranch. A yelp came from a few metres ahead of him and Genis froze. _Don't tell me…_

"Ow! You brat! Get back here!" The singed Desian caught him by the arm and swung him around forcefully. "What are you...you're a half-elf!" His eyes narrowed. "Don't tell me you actually live together with those inferior beings."

"Look who's talking," Genis retorted sarcastically, inwardly burning with fury. _Who does this guy think he is?_

The Desian looked angry. "It's people like you who cater to them that keeps those inferior beings thinking they're on the same level as us! I can't believe a fellow half-elf could associate with such filth." He shook his head in disgust. "I guess I'd better take you in. I was thinking of letting you go since you're a half-elf and all, but evidently you're no better than the inferior beings you call friends."

Genis struggled, but it was no use; the Desian was much stronger than he was, and soon enough he found himself stripped of his weapons and thrown into a dark cell.

* * *

Lloyd was utterly shocked. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd seen Colette cry, but here she was, tears running down her delicate face. Immediately, he wrapped his arms around her and let her sob into his chest. When she had calmed down a bit, he pulled back and held her at arm's length. "Okay," he said firmly. "You need to tell me what's going on. I knew something was bothering you, but since you hadn't said anything I thought I'd respect that. But if it's hurting you this much, I'm not going to let you go through it alone!"

"Lloyd, I…" Colette started, but before she could finish a voice interrupted them. It was the Professor. Lloyd felt a flash of annoyance – did she have to come in _now_? – but pushed it away. The Professor probably had a good reason.

She took in the looks on their faces and said, "I'm sorry if I'm interrupting something, but I just wanted to ask if either of you have seen Genis. I can't find him anywhere." The worry was clear in her voice.

Lloyd felt a spurt of panic. He'd heard Rai and Genis having some kind of argument earlier, but he'd been too preoccupied with Colette and her unexpected outburst to go look for Genis. What if he'd gone to the forest and gotten hurt? Or maybe even encountered some Desians? His friend _had_ been acting a little odd lately…

He leapt to his feet. "Professor," he said urgently, "did Genis say anything out of the ordinary to you today?"

The Professor furrowed her brow. "No," she sighed finally. "I talked to him for a moment after school, but after that he went off with Rai and I haven't seen him since…" Before she could finish, Lloyd had raced out of the door.

He had to find Rai. For sure that argument he'd had with Genis must have something to do with this. He sprinted over to the Sages' house and flung open the door. "Rai? Genis?" The house was empty, as he'd expected. Where else could Rai be? Just then, he heard a voice from behind him.

"What are you doing in my house?" Rai said, sounding annoyed.

"This isn't the time for that!" Lloyd said forcefully. "Genis has disappeared, and the last one to see him was you. I need to know what you were arguing about earlier!" He saw Rai's eyes widen fractionally and narrowed his own accusingly. "You know something, don't you?"

For the first time since he'd met Rai, some of the boy's calm façade cracked and he looked worried. "I…"

"Don't tell me he's gone to the human ranch," Lloyd pressed on. Genis had been sneaking away some of his lunch for the past few days now, although to give to whom Lloyd hadn't known; but if he wasn't in the village, the only other place was…

Rai's mouth thinned. "…That thick-headed idiot. Even if he was upset, I can't believe he actually…"

Lloyd grabbed the elf by the shoulders and shook him slightly. "Do you really think this is the time for that?!" he demanded. "If Genis has gone to the ranch, we need to get him back _right away_ , before those Desians do something horrible to him!"

Rai's eyes closed and he didn't respond for a moment, and then they flashed open. "Then it's best if I go."

Lloyd stared at him. He'd never expected Rai to say something like that; he didn't seem like the type to barge into a human ranch on a rescue mission. "I'm coming too," he said firmly. Rai sighed.

"Lloyd, there's something you need to know," he said, "but you can't tell anyone else in the village about it."

"Fine, fine," Lloyd said hurriedly, "as long as we can save Genis. What is it? Do you know something?"

Rai looked conflicted and slightly hesitant, and Lloyd wondered briefly what it could possibly be that was affecting him so. Finally he said, "I'm a half-elf. So if I go to the Desians, I can pretend I want to join them and get Genis out that way."

Lloyd gaped. So he was a half-elf, fine…that was unexpected, but Lloyd could understand why he hadn't told them. But to go to the Desians, pretending to be one of their own…

"What's going on here? What's this about the Desians?" the Professor's voice cut into their conversation. Lloyd whirled around and faced the door, and Rai turned more slowly.

"I told Lloyd I'm a half-elf," he explained. "Genis has likely gone to the human ranch, so I'll go scout things out. It's safest for me to go, since I can always pretend to want to join the Desians if I need to save him."

The Professor looked shocked. She must have known about Rai being a half-elf, Lloyd realized. She started to say something, but Rai interrupted her. "It's okay, I told him about you guys being pure-blooded elves, and that you hid my identity to protect me," he said. The Professor said nothing, but she looked sad and knowing as she gazed at Rai. Rai was pointedly looking away.

"Well, let's get going now then!" Lloyd said, trying to diffuse the tension. "We should try to get to Genis as soon as possible."

Rai looked at him steadily with his clear green eyes. "Actually," he said, "I was thinking it might be better if we wait awhile."

Lloyd was shocked. "Why?" he asked. "How could that possibly help Genis?"

"Well, it's the middle of the night right now," Rai said reasonably in that infuriating way he had. "If Genis did go to the ranch, then he's likely already captured by now, and since he's an elf, the Desians probably won't do anything to him right away. And if he didn't go to the ranch, then we should give him a chance to come back. If he isn't back by tomorrow, we'll make a plan to go see what's going on. Plus, I think we should do it without letting anyone else in the village know. After all, if Genis has gone there, then he's broken the non-aggression treaty – I doubt the mayor will like that."

Lloyd clenched his fists. He didn't like the idea of just waiting while his friend was in danger, but he could see that Rai had a point, and the professor was nodding as well. Finally he said, "Fine, I guess that makes sense, but…how can you be so…uncaring? It's your brother who's been captured!"

Rai's eyes flashed with such fury that Lloyd was taken aback. "How _dare_ you imply that I don't care about Genis," he snapped. "It's _because_ I care about him that I'm trying to be reasonable. Just because I don't rush headlong into danger at the drop of a hat – "

"That's enough, Rai, Lloyd," the Professor cut in, stepping between them. "Rai is right – it would be foolhardy to try to storm the ranch now. I'm worried about Genis too, but we shouldn't lose our heads."

Lloyd sighed. How the hell was he supposed to sleep with his best friend captured? It would be a long night.

* * *

Genis jolted to alertness as he was abruptly jerked out of his cell into the early morning light. Disoriented, he looked around and realized that all the human prisoners were also being released and herded out towards the courtyard out back. He shivered with foreboding – he doubted they were being led towards anything good – and then glanced around to see if he could see Marble anywhere, but there was no sign of her. He glared at the Desian holding his arm and to his surprise, the Desian actually let go. Then he moved closer to Genis and whispered, "You can avoid all this unpleasantness if you give up those inferior beings and join us. After all, you _are_ of the superior race yourself."

Genis glared at him and said nothing, mind racing. It occurred to him that he could pretend to be interested in joining and look for a way to escape, but then they'd probably expect him to start mistreating the humans – if he refused, his cover would be blown and he'd be in an even worse situation than before. At least right now the Desians weren't sure where his allegiances lay; maybe he could stall by pretending to be interested in their organization. Quickly, he wiped the anger off his face, hoping the Desian hadn't noticed it or would attribute it to fear. Trying to sound timid, he asked softly, "Are half-elves really superior? The humans always said…"

Just as he had hoped, the Desian's face tightened with anger on Genis's behalf. "Those filthy humans said _you_ were inferior? Those beasts. With us, you'll be accepted for who you are, and no one will discriminate against you based on the amount of elven or human blood in your veins."

Despite himself, Genis was interested. No discrimination? They'd accept him? But…no. _Don't forget the horrible atrocities these people commit_ , he reminded himself. The Desian seemed to have noticed the confusion on Genis's face, because his face softened and he clapped Genis on the shoulder. "Think about it," he said softly. "But for now, since you're still a prisoner, you'll have to go with the rest to watch the execution. I'm sorry."

The blood drained out of Genis's face as the Desian walked away and he was pushed forward with the crowd. _Execution? No way. This is sick…_ He closed his eyes, fighting the urge to vomit or pass out, and steeled himself for what he was about to witness. _I can't lose control, I can't lose control_ …

They entered a wide-open area at the back of the ranch that was familiar to Genis; it was here, by the perimeter, that he used to meet with Marble. _Marble. I hope she's all right_ , he thought worriedly. Why wasn't she here with the rest of the prisoners? He felt a trickle of unease as he realized… _No, it can't be…._

Genis looked up and felt as if he had been turned to ice. Being dragged up to the front, flanked by a group of Desians, was Marble.

* * *

Colette bit her lip nervously. She couldn't stop worrying about what might be happening to Genis right now at the hands of the Desians. He'd probably gone there because he wanted to save the people at the ranch…

She sighed. She'd thought about it many times herself; people were suffering at the ranch, so shouldn't she, as the Chosen, be able to protect them? She'd comforted herself with the fact that once she regenerated the world, they would be saved, but she knew that many of them would be killed before their salvation came…

Her eyes closed. This was her fault. She was the one who was supposed to save everyone – because she couldn't save the people at the ranch, Genis was in danger. _Genis, I'm so sorry…_ Tomorrow, she'd definitely go with them to save Genis, she decided. _I can't just stand by and let something bad happen to him!_

She was jolted out of her thoughts by a loud thump, and she realized that Lloyd had driven his fist into a nearby tree trunk. He lowered his hand and she could see blood running down his knuckles and dripping onto the ground. "Lloyd!" she cried in dismay, running over to him. "Please don't beat yourself up over this! Genis will…be all right…" Even to her own ears, her voice sounded hollow and unconvincing, but she gently picked up Lloyd's hand and pulled off his glove. He stared unseeingly past her, as if he had forgotten she was even there, so she guided him towards the trunk and pushed him into a sitting position so she could bind his hand.

"Lloyd," she said finally, as gently as she could. "It's not your fault…"

Lloyd's eyes finally focused on her, and he looked so helpless…Her heart broke at the sight of seeing Lloyd, who was always sure of himself, reduced to such a state. After a pause, he spoke falteringly.

"But…I knew he was giving some of his lunch to someone. I should have realized what was going on, I should have…I should –" His voice broke and Colette wrapped her arms around him comfortingly, just as he had done for her not too long ago.

"There's no way you could have known, Lloyd," she murmured. "No one would have expected you to. Besides, it's –" She stopped herself before she could say 'It's my fault, too'. She knew that would only agitate Lloyd more.

As she held her best friend, she realized that part of her was relieved that Lloyd had forgotten about her earlier loss of control, at least temporarily. She hoped he wouldn't ask about it again; she didn't know how long she could lie to him…

She felt a sudden stab of guilt. How could she be feeling _glad_ that this had happened, just because of her own selfish reason? _I should be thinking of Genis right now, not myself!_ She closed her eyes and sent a prayer up to the Goddess Martel. _Please, Your Grace. Let him be safe._

* * *

Rai stared into space, his eyes blank. He couldn't believe that he'd revealed himself to Lloyd, of all people. He was proud of being a half-elf, but he'd had to hide for so long that just coming out and saying it…felt wrong. He hoped he'd managed to pull it off without seeming too ruffled, but his heart had been pounding like a drum and he'd broken out in a cold sweat at the thought of finally telling someone.

Still, it had to be done. After all, Genis…

Rai sighed. He still couldn't understand why he always became so weak when it came to Genis. In both this life and his previous – if that was indeed what his odd memories signified – he had always acted in his own self-interest. Even actions that pleased others were usually carefully calculated so that others' affection for him would grow, or so that he could curry favor and later receive favors back in return. But Genis…when Lloyd had told him that the younger half-elf had disappeared, Rai's heart had skipped a beat and for a second he had feared it would stop altogether. It had been an odd and dangerous feeling, one that he did not much want to experience again. _Just don't let Genis get into trouble again_. But that wasn't an answer. _Why_ did he care about Genis's safety so? Yes, he should care about his brother, but if he got into trouble because he was an idiot, Rai shouldn't have to be responsible…

That was what his mind said. But still, Rai had a nervous tension in his chest that refused to go away. Even though he had been the one to point out that they should wait and not go to save Genis right away, he still felt as if he should immediately go to his brother's aid. _Have I become an irrational idiot who acts impulsively on his emotions?_ he thought of himself in disgust. He ran his hands through his hair, pushing the long silver bangs out of his eyes, and then propped his chin in his hands. Well, there was no point in brooding about it – it would hardly change anything. He'd decided to wait until at least mid-afternoon tomorrow before going to the ranch after Genis, so he'd stand by that decision. He should get to his nightly practice in magic.

What an odd relationship he had with Genis, Rai mused as he got to his feet and dusted off his knee-length black pants. He cared about him to the point where he almost ( _almost_ , but not quite) became irrational, but at the same time was so envious of him that he had to practice spells every night in secret to keep up. It was a secret he had kept from Genis for almost a year, and his brother had come close to finding it out the other day. In fact, in a way Lloyd had saved him by rolling into the classroom, Rai thought with dry amusement.

He raised his hands, palms facing out. It was the pose he used in order to channel his magical power, since unlike Genis, he did not use a weapon. He focused his mind with practiced ease and hissed, " _Icicle_." As the sharp frozen shard spiked up from the ground, he examined it critically. He had noticed over the past few weeks that by tailoring how he focused his mind and how precisely he channeled his mana, he could alter the density, height, and width of the icicle. Every night he would practice his control, making the ice spike higher or lower, testing its strength, measuring its thickness with his eyes.

He had also realized that saying incantations for spells was entirely unnecessary, although very helpful. Without voicing the incantations aloud, it was very difficult to cast magic – however, it was still possible, as Rai had finally proved two days ago. As long as he could prevent his mind from wandering and keep it firmly focused on the spell and the spell only, he could manage to cast completely nonverbally, although it took a lot of concentration.

Rai had long since concluded that although he had better concentration of mind, Genis had a natural control over his mana. This was what prevented Rai from easily mastering new spells and what allowed Genis to almost intuitively shape his body's life energy into new attacks. Each different element required the mana that fueled it to be released in a specific way, and had to be infused with specific feelings. Wind was cutting, thin, and razor-sharp; ice was biting and cold; fire was fury and heat. Rai found it impossible to harness light magic or earth magic, but he could harness ice, fire, and darkness with extreme ease, while wind, lightning, and water were achievable but more difficult.

As he ran through his mental exercises and cast fifty times in each element, as he did every night, he did his best to keep his mind from straying to thoughts of his brother.

* * *

Genis felt like a hollow shell, and his eyes burned as if someone had thrown alcohol in his face. When he had first seen Marble, ice had spread through his body, and soon fire had followed it; now, neither was left.

He remembered how he had screamed and cried, how he had spewed profanities he hadn't even known he _knew_ , how he had struggled and lashed out at the Desians restraining him, and how Marble had…

Marble had…turned into a monster…

And then the Desians had… _hunted_ her, as if she were an animal…

Genis shuddered, and even though he had thought he must have dried up all the water in his body by now, his eyes once more filled with hot tears. _All my fault…_

They'd killed Marble because she'd been secretly meeting with someone from outside the ranch. As an example to the rest of the prisoners. _My fault. She was meeting me._

And it wasn't enough to just kill her – they'd had to make her, a gentle, kind old lady, lose control and then make _sport_ of ending her life…

He was still horrified, but his tears were drying up again. If he wanted to gain control of himself, he'd have to think about something academic, and not about how Marble… _no_. Now was not the time to brood about it. He'd cried and cried, but he needed to find a way out of here, and then he could mourn Marble properly.

A thought occurred to him and he opened his right fist. The round, blue stone gazed back at him. He knew from seeing Lloyd's similar gem that this was an 'exsphere', a tool for increasing one's innate abilities. But then why, for Marble, had it…

He closed his eyes and leaned back against the wall, thinking. The Desians had removed the stone from Marble's hand, and as soon as they had done so, the mana that made up her body had begun to pulse, and twist, and…he shuddered again to think of it. It was horribly unnatural, and he knew it must have been extremely painful.

He wiped his eyes angrily before he could begin sobbing again and directed his mind back to the matter at hand. If removing the exsphere had caused her mana to go out of control, then somehow her body must have become dependent on it. He doubted Lloyd's exsphere worked like that though...Dirk wouldn't have given his son something so dangerous. So there must be some fundamental difference between Lloyd's exsphere and Marble's…but what?

He yawned despite himself – his body was horribly taxed, he realized, feeling how his own mana was several times more depleted than normal – and leaned back against the wall. He'd ask Lloyd about it later when he got out, and he couldn't think of a way out when he was so tired…

"You! Out, now!" He opened his eyes and glanced at the bars. It was the same Desian who had tried to convince him to join before – Alai, as the others had called him. Before Genis could move, the Desians had thrust the cell door open and pulled Genis outside.

Genis was led along, prodded periodically in the back by the Desian. Nobody seemed to question where they were going – likely the Desian had orders to remove Genis. But when he was shoved out of the human ranch and into the forest, he turned around in shock. "What –?"

"Shut up," hissed the Desian quickly, grabbing Genis by the upper arm and dragging him further away from the ranch. When they were several metres away, he glanced around and then said, "You're only a kid, and a half-elf to boot; I feel sorry for you, and I don't think you should have had to see that execution. So I'm going to take you back to your village – but don't think I'm on your side," he added sharply, as Genis opened his mouth. "I'll not mention it to Lord Forcystus or the other higher-ups this time, but don't expect any other special treatment in the future." He paused. "And, of course, I'll be warning the inferior beings that any further breaches of the treaty will not be taken so lightly." He glanced at Genis and added, "I think you'll soon see, though, that half-elves have no place among humans. If they knew what you were, they would turn on you without a moment's thought."

With that, he resumed the quick pace, dragging a shocked Genis in his wake.

* * *

"Get out here, inferior beings!" The harsh yell rang in Rai's ears, and he hurriedly sprang to his feet and exited the house. By the village entrance was a Desian, and next to him – Rai felt a rush of relief – was Genis.

Within a few minutes, all the villagers had gathered. There was a strangled yell from Lloyd. "Genis!" The swordsman attempted to rush forward, but Raine caught his arm. Rai knew why. There was no knowing what the Desian's intentions were in bringing Genis back.

"Listen up, filth," the Desian snarled. "This brat has been found on our property – in clear violation of the non-aggression treaty." Shocked whispers sprang up throughout the crowd, but the Desian held up a hand for quiet and they subsided. "However," he continued, pausing – for dramatic effect, Rai thought – before he finished his sentence. "I have seen fit to condone this one time, and neglect to report this for Lord Forcystus." Before the crowd could make a sound, he added loudly, "After all, this child _is_ of the superior race – a half-elf, much more deserving than filth like you. I could hardly condemn one of my own kin."

There was a shocked, heavy silence. Rai could probably have heard a pin drop, if there were one to hear.

"At any rate, you have all been warned," the Desian said. Before he released Genis, who looked petrified and ashamed, he bent over to whisper something into the boy's ear. From Rai's vantage point, he managed to make out the words "…for your own good." He frowned, wondering what that could mean – and then it became clear. The Desian had revealed Genis's race in an effort to show the boy that humans were not to be trusted.

Rai gritted his teeth angrily. Although that was true – humans were indeed by and large a fickle and dull-witted race – that was hardly a good reason to expose a mere child to such cruelty as would now be heaped on him by the villagers.

Several thoughts entered his mind at the same time as he scrambled frantically for the best course of action. His first thought was that one option was to simply let Genis take the fall, but he rejected that possibility almost immediately for multiple reasons – one, that Rai's own identity as well as Raine's would then come into jeopardy, and two, that he simply didn't want Genis to have to face that. He also considered that if Genis and Raine were both to be exiled, even considering Rai escaped the same fate, he would then be alone in a now suspicious village – not a very appealing thought. And there was also the debt he still had to Raine, he admitted grudgingly to himself; she had raised him and for that she deserved something in return.

Suddenly another thought came to him, and slowly, his mind cleared. Yes – there was a way he could resolve this, a way in which he could kill two birds with one stone. He smirked slightly. Things were always better when one had a plan.


	4. Confrontation

Hateful stares. Disgust. Eyes boring into him from every side. Genis didn't dare seek out his friends for fear that he would see the same emotions in their eyes as well. He would be abandoned again. Just as he had been by his parents, and just as he had been by his previous friends. Lloyd was a good person, but surely even he would feel betrayed and be disgusted that he had been friends with a half-elf - a half-elf just like the ones who had killed his mother.

Through the haze of his emotions and the odd ringing in his ears, he heard a voice. One he recognized. His head jerked up in confusion and he stared at Rai, from whom the sound had come. No. His brother couldn't possibly have said what Genis thought he'd said...In his shock, his ears cleared and suddenly he could hear every sound more sharply than he would have liked.

"How do we know you're not lying?" the mayor was snarling, staring at Rai with narrowed eyes. "You could just be lying to save your brother. Or you could both be half-elves, for all we know!"

Genis's heart felt like it was being squeezed in his chest. He wanted to speak, but his mouth was dry and he couldn't seem to make it - or anything else - move. _No. What is he doing?_

Rai faced the mayor calmly, his green eyes as cold as they had ever been. There was a hatred there that Genis had hardly ever seen his brother show. "You humans are so unbelievably dim-witted," Rai said with a voice like ice. "Do you want me to lay it out for you? I was adopted by Raine and Genis. They are not my true siblings by blood. Haven't you ever wondered why Genis is so much more magically gifted than I am? That's the true elven blood running in his veins. As a mere half-elf, I couldn't possibly be as strong."

Genis closed his eyes. He knew that wasn't true. The amount of elven blood running through your veins didn't necessarily correlate to the strength of your magic. But when he glanced back at the villagers, he could see that they now looked confused and were muttering amongst themselves. He felt an inkling of surprise. Were humans really this gullible?

No, that was besides the point. More importantly - he couldn't let Rai do this. Genis was the one who'd caused all this to happen, so there was no way he was going to let someone else take the blame. He opened his mouth to interject, only to find a hand covering his mouth and his sister's voice whispering in his ear. When had she made her way over to him?

"Genis, stop. If you admit that you're a half-elf, what Rai is doing now will be for nothing. We will all be exiled from the village. Do you understand?"

Genis felt ice run through his body once more. Raine was right. But that didn't make it feel any less wrong.

* * *

Rai surveyed the villagers gathered around the clearing, unfazed by their muttering and sideways glances. At least, he tried to be unfazed. He should be. After all, there was no reason for him to care what assumptions these ignorant bigots made about him on the basis of his race. They hated him mostly out of fear, and it was a logical and inevitable happening that the less capable should fear and hate their superiors. Half-elves were not only more intelligent on average than full-blooded humans but were also capable of using magic, something no human could hope to accomplish. That was simply the way nature had dealt things out.

He made sure to keep his posture relaxed and his eyes unreadable while he waited to see what the villagers' response would be. He noticed that the Chosen was absent from the crowd and wondered briefly where she was before remembering that she would be at the temple at this time, preparing for the Journey of Regeneration. Regeneration indeed.

The mayor was staring at through narrowed eyes as if struggling to come to a conclusion about what Rai had said. Rai met his gaze with a hint of disdain, then glanced at Genis, who looked more frozen than before, if that was even possible. His brother opened his mouth as if to say something - of course, Rai should have known Genis wouldn't like this - but before Rai had to do anything, Raine had silenced her brother. Just as expected. _Of course there's no way she would let her real brother get into trouble_ , Rai thought bitterly. Raine had always cared for Genis more. It was to be expected, since they were related by blood.

The mayor finally began speaking again. "If this is true - " he said slowly. Rai cut in before he could continue.

"Of course it's true," he said haughtily. "Why in the world would I lie in such a self-destructive manner as this? Revealing myself to be a half-elf is hardly beneficial to me. Do I have any reason to lie? Please think a little before you speak." _Of course, there is no reason why I would tell such a self-destructive truth either_ , he thought wryly, _but these humans are too dull-witted to pick up on that_.

As he had anticipated, his words served to further infuriate the mayor. "Silence, half-elf," the elderly man snapped, fingers jumping to his moustache. "I am the mayor of this village and I will not be spoken to in that way, especially by a half-breed. You've decieved us all and I can't allow someone so dangerous to stay. After all, for all we know, you could be working for the Desians - "

"And how do you figure that?"

Rai stiffened in surprise. This new interjection was something he hadn't counted on.

"L-Lloyd?" stammered the mayor in surprise as the tall swordsman stepped forward, his eyes firm. "What do you mean?"

"Why does Rai being a half-elf mean that he's working for the Desians? Actually, why does it matter at all that he's a half-elf? Genis and Raine are elves, so they're different from us too, but they're still allowed to stay in the village!"

Rai clenched his hands into fists. Why was Lloyd defending him? _He's going to ruin everything with his stupidity, no matter how well-meaning._  
The swordsman was already continuing further.

"In fact, to be perfectly honest, I already - "

No. That fool.

" - already knew that Rai was a half-elf."

Rai felt like smacking a hand to his forehead, refraining only because of the scores of eyes fixed on him.

There was a short silence. Then the mayor bellowed, "Lloyd Irving, you _knew_ that there was a half-breed traitor living in our village and you deliberately hid this from us?"

Lloyd looked bewildered and defensive. "Haven't you been listening to anything I've been saying? He isn't a traitor, and it shouldn't matter that he's a half-"

Rai had had enough. "That will do, Lloyd," he cut in smoothly, and the villagers' heads swung around neatly to face him instead. _You're not spectators at a duel,_ he thought irritably, but managed to keep his face neutral. "I appreciate your efforts, but there is no need to overstrain yourself trying to reason with these people. There is also no need to lie. Thank you for trying to help me, but I know you had no idea about my race." He ignored Lloyd's stunned expression and turned to face the mayor, who looked even more flabbergasted than before. "I will leave this village," he said clearly as gasps broke out throughout the clearing, "since it is clear you were planning to exile me. Although I will point out that exiling a half-elf before knowing his allegiances is a truly idiotic move, since regardless of whether I was working with the Desians in the past or not, it is certainly a much more attractive option now. Good day." He turned to make his way back towards his house, praying that neither Lloyd nor Genis would say anything more. Of course that would have been much too good to be true.

"If you're exiling him, then I'm going too," Lloyd said firmly, at the same time as Genis started, "This isn't f- " before he was muffled again by Raine's hand. Rai froze mid-step, barely restraining himself from turning back around. Of all the idiotic...

"Very well," he heard the mayor say from behind him. "From this day, by the rights I hold as mayor, I exile Lloyd Irving and Rai Sage from this village. Be gone!" Rai's sensitive ears picked up his footsteps as he stormed away towards his house.

Slowly, the villagers started to disperse. After a few moments of utter silence during which Rai tried - and failed miserably - to calm his emotions, he whirled on Lloyd. "What the hell did you think you were doing?" he hissed. "If you wanted to gain some kind of favor with me, I'm afraid you're sadly mistaken - "

To Rai's chagrin, Lloyd actually interrupted him. "It's nothing like that," the other boy said with uncharacteristic seriousness. "I believe that everyone who is born has the same right to live without being treated differently. I don't want to live in a village where others are kicked out because of something they can't help."

Rai found that for once, he was actually speechless.

Genis finally spoke up as well, pushing Raine's hand away roughly. "Lloyd's right, he said firmly, locking his gaze with Rai's. "You shouldn't have done that, Rai. It was me who made a mistake, so it shouldn't have to be you who pays for it. I'm coming with you, after all I'm also -"

"That's enough," Rai said quickly before his brother could reveal his race. "There's no point in you leaving the village too. Understand? If you don't want this kind of thing to happen, don't make that sort of mistake in the first place." He softened a little when he saw the look in Genis's eyes. "It's not like I won't see you again." He turned to Lloyd and added grudgingly, "Is it all right if I stay at your place for a bit, considering the circumstances? I assure you I don't plan to be there forever, but..."

"Of course I don't mind," said Lloyd, and then added, "Oh, and Genis - meet me in the forest tomorrow morning just before sunrise. We have a lot to talk about."

Rai turned to Raine. "I have things to discuss with you as well. Would perhaps the same time be convenient, as well as the usual place?" He was impressed at the neutrality in his own voice.

"Yes, of course," she responded, her eyes showing uncharacteristic worry. "Rai, I -"

"No need," he cut in curtly. "I know you're grateful I saved your brother. Don't worry about it." He turned and stalked off before she could say anything else. He didn't want to hear it - the words that confirmed Genis was more important to her, that Rai was only an outsider with no relation to anybody.

Even though he'd accomplished the first step to something he'd been planning for years, Rai's heart felt like ice.

* * *

Genis could hardly believe the events of the past day. No - it was more that he didn't want to believe it. First capture, then...then Marble, then the odd behavior of the Desian, topped off with the horrible revelation and Rai's sacrifice. As the latter event came to mind, Genis felt a horrible twinge in his chest. It took him a moment to identify the feeling as guilt - guilt so heart-wrenching that for a few moments he was drowning in it, suffocating, so ashamed and angry that he could hardly breathe. He had dismissed his brother's opinion, even yelled at him, and caused Marble to die. And to make it worse - nothing had happened to Genis. No; Rai had suffered all the consequences, despite having been right...

The young half-elf realized that his face was wet and he wiped away the salty tears angrily with his sleeve. His brother - and Lloyd too, he thought guiltily - were both exiled, and he was sitting here crying? _As if I'm not useless enough right now as it is_ , he thought furiously. What was wrong with him? What had happened to his usual sarcastic self, to his confidence in his abilities? He needed to get it together! _And I owe Lloyd a major explanation_ , he thought suddenly, the guilt returning in full flood as he remembered his meeting with his best friend in only a few more hours.  
Everything was his fault, so he should at least tell Lloyd everything.

And Rai. Even though his brother acted unfeeling, Genis knew he cared more than anyone, no matter how much he denied it even to himself. He thought back to the time when a human girl in the village had been obsessed with Rai, gushing about him to everyone that came near her; Rai had rejected her harshly, and the girl had cried for days. The children of the village had been abuzz with this confirmation of the Ice Prince's lack of consideration for others, and with righteous anger on the girl's behalf.

Only Genis had known what his brother might be thinking - after all, he was a half-elf also. Rai knew as well as Genis the horrible relations between elves and humans - a human girl should have known not to flirt with someone who was, to her, an elf. But when Genis had brought the subject up, Rai had insisted that he wasn't noble the way Genis made it sound, that he had only reacted that way because the girl was annoying him and below his standards. His brother had lied so convincingly that even Genis had almost believed him - until he caught the telltale twitching of his right earlobe, a sign that Rai was not telling the truth. It was a habit that was only obvious when Rai was with Genis for whatever reason; Genis doubted that Rai realized this himself, even now.

Coming back to the present, Genis felt furious with himself for calling Rai cold-hearted. He, of all people, should know better.

* * *

It was testament to the complexity of the situation that Raine Sage's mind was racing past her ability to control it.

And so she had done the only thing she could do, and that was to retreat from the situation to regroup. The only problem was, it didn't seem to be working quite as well as it usually did.

Somehow, it seemed that Raine's consciousness had separated into multiple distinct parts, one of which, staring blankly out over the small pond near her home, was aware of the stares of other villagers, but was completely disconnected from the rest, which were trapped inside her skull and were thus connected and yet not.

The first voice was urging, _Genis is inside, he's your brother, go comfort him -_

Even as the voice Raine liked to think of as her rational mind thought it probably it would be best to leave him alone now.

But still the first voice continued to nag, and even as it did a third was vying urgently to make itself heard - _You need to think about what Rai did...think, Raine, what are his possible motivations, it seems so out of character -_

To which her sentimentality started desperately _but no, how can you think that way, he did it only to help you and Genis, how can you even suspect -_

That voice she immediately quashed, though, as she so often did. And she looked back to the voice of rationality, and Raine couldn't help but be swayed by its argument that _there is more to this than meets the eye_ , because logically Rai could have achieved this in a number of other, safer, less self-destructive ways...

Sentimentality immediately tried to respond that maybe Rai just hadn't thought of that, but Raine knew better than to listen to it and already Rationality was scoffing, of course Rai had thought of it...

_Shut up_ , she thought firmly to the voices in her mind, and although they refused to subside, she would do her best to think through them. Then she closed her eyes.

The fact was that Rai had made a decision she would never have expected him to make, thus upsetting any reasonable expectations Raine had previously been prepared to react to. Although it was admittedly touching that he would be so self-sacrificing - the logical conclusion, her experience told her, was that he _hadn't been self-sacrificing._

Or at least, not purely so. After all, why hadn't the meticulous, careful half-elf at least attempted to convince the villagers that the Desian was lying through more conventional means of persuasion - and for that matter, why had he then seemed so very eager to be exiled? He'd suggested the option himself, which Raine knew was completely out of character for him. _Obviously_ , she argued, unsure of with whom she was arguing, _obviously, there really is more to this than meets the eye._

On the other hand, what was done was done, and Rai had done both Raine and Genis a favor, regardless of possible ulterior motives...

She sighed. When Rai had stepped forward, she herself had felt a twinge, an urge to stop him. But as usual, she had been forced to silence Sentimentality when she realized that Rationality made much, much more sense, and so she had moved to keep her brother from the very intervention she herself had wanted to make. Because she could see that Rai had had a plan, probably a specific one. And whatever it was, intervention would only spoil both it and any chance that at least some of them would be able to escape the wrath of the village.

No matter how much Rationality and Raine agreed that Raine had made the right decision, however, Sentimentality would pop up at intervals and whine _why couldn't you save him, why didn't you react first before your little brother had to step in, did you really need to reinforce his stupid idea that you don't care about him -_

She sighed as she once again pushed that voice to the back of her mind, and thought, not for the first time, _this can't be healthy..._

Not to mention she hadn't even yet addressed the problem of Lloyd. Rai probably hadn't anticipated Lloyd's actions, which only went to show that the half-elf didn't understand Lloyd in the least, and certainly not as much as he thought he did. Which was to be expected, Raine thought, a little sadly. Rai had never understood the concept of helping others simply because you cared, without weighing factors of personal gain. Which came back again to her surety that he had some kind of hidden reasoning...

One thing was clear, though, despite the chaos raging in her mind. Rai might have more reasons for what he'd done than solely his worry for Genis, but the simple fact that the latter reason existed made it impossible for Raine to condemn him for it.

* * *

The forest seemed different today, more uncertain, far less familiar. That was saying something when it came to Lloyd Irving, because he knew this place like the back of his hand.

Today, though, as he made his way to where he'd agreed to meet Genis, nothing seemed the same, and it was like the whole of Sylvarant had turned on its head -

No longer did this forest connect him to Iselia. For him, Iselia was no longer an option - it was cut off, inaccessible. The place where he'd grown up, the villagers he had known for years - all no longer his.

That thought was fleeting, though, because there were more important things to think about. Such as what had happened to Genis, and what had happened with Rai, who was probably meeting Raine right now, or who knows what else he was doing. Lloyd had no doubt that he had done the right thing in defending Rai, but for whatever reason Rai didn't seem very appreciative. And then there was Genis...

Lloyd clenched his fists. After what Rai had done, there was no doubt in his mind that Genis was a half-elf. The look in his friend's eyes whenever his race was mentioned, his undeniable guilt when that Desian had made that announcement - Lloyd knew Genis far too well to be fooled for a second. But the thing was, that didn't matter, and he was furious that the other villagers seemed to think it did. Genis was one of the coolest people he knew, and he was smart, too, even though he was younger than Lloyd. He just hoped that Genis knew that, didn't believe for a second that he somehow was less worthy because he was a half-elf, and he hoped Genis knew Lloyd knew that...

He saw Genis up ahead and broke into a run.

And when he reached his best friend, panting to catch his breath, his heart sank more than a little, because Genis wasn't meeting his eyes.

"Genis!" Lloyd exclaimed in his friendliest voice, clapping him on the back. "I'm glad you could get away." _What should I say to make him understand?_

His friend's eyes were still fixed on the ground, and when he spoke, there was none of the sarcasm Lloyd was used to. "Lloyd, I'm so sorry...you were...this is all my fault - "

Lloyd didn't let him finish. "No, Genis, this is not your fault," he said firmly, placing his hands on his friend's shoulders. "I said what I did of my own free will, and I would do it again if I got the chance. I really believe it, Genis - I don't care if you or anyone is a half-elf or an elf or a bird or whatever - you're still you."

Genis looked up and his eyes looked desperate. "L-Lloyd, but it's not just that, I've been lying to you, I know what Rai said but actually I - "

"I already know," Lloyd said quickly. "That you're a half-elf. That's what you were going to say, right?"

His friend looked shocked. "How did you...?"

"Hey, come on, I feel hurt. We aren't best friends for nothing, you know."

Far from looking reassured, though, Genis looked panicked now. "But I've been lying to you this whole time, and don't you see, I didn't trust you, didn't trust you to still be friends with me..."

Lloyd almost laughed, he was so relieved. That's what Genis had been worried about? "You dork! Of course we're still friends. Look, I understand your not telling me, and honestly, it doesn't matter. Like I said, it's fine if you're a half-elf, and it was fine if you were an elf. And if you didn't tell me, I know you had your reasons. You've always been a good friend to me and there's no way I would let something like this - "

He paused and faltered a little as he realized that there were tears running down Genis's cheeks. The half-elf covered his face with his hands. Lloyd stammered, "Are you...?" He wasn't sure what he had been saying before.

"Lloyd...Thanks. I..."

"It's okay. I already know."

After a few minutes when Genis had calmed down a bit, he said, "There's more, though, you know. Like what happened at the ranch, and I know you hate Desians, but I actually sympathized with one for a split second - "

Lloyd listened to what had happened. And although he was shocked, and horrified, and angry on Genis's behalf, relief was bubbling up inside him.  
He still had his best friend. And more importantly, Genis still had him.


	5. Mind Games

Rai rested his back against the nearby tree and kept his eyes closed. One part of his mind was probing, searching around him for the slightest changes in mana. After all, he couldn't afford to be ambushed by some monster and be killed - it would be an especially ridiculous way for his plan to be foiled.

All the other parts were directed inward, occupied with various issues. In one corner of his mind, he pondered the odd memories of another childhood; in another, he analyzed the possibilities for his next, specific move; and in yet a third several opposing thoughts were locked into battle over the optimal way to join the Journey of Regeneration (without seeming suspicious, but that was a minor bonus).

The aforementioned first part was enveloped in memory. Memory of a time when he had been - Rai could explain it no other way - decidedly human. But it was more than that. Not only had he lacked pointed ears and magical power, there had been no mana in his body - actually, no mana anywhere. The air had been empty, dry, and stifling. Or maybe that was because he hadn't been able to sense mana?

It made sense, though, as he had concluded years ago, that there would at least be limited mana, because of the prevalence of what seemed to be magitechnology. Although from his memories, it didn't seem that it had been called magitechnology (technology, yes, but "magi" didn't seem to be in the picture, regardless of how much Rai had racked his brain searching for it). Not only that - if Rai's not being a half-elf hadn't been strange enough - he had looked different too. In short, he had been an entirely different person. With black hair, rounded _human_ ears, and dark brown eyes, to be exact.

If the prevalence of magitechnology, or rather technology, had been the only thing he remembered (which it had been, for some years) he would have thought these memories were simply memories of his time up there, with Father, where there had definitely been plenty of magitechnology (although also plenty of mana, and Rai had been decidedly half-elven then).

But with all the major factors taken together, along with some other memories of things that just shouldn't be possible, and the fact that he remembered that there wasn't magic in that time -

Rai could only conclude that his memories were of another - specifically, a past - life.

_Don't remember it_ , whispered a voice in his mind. _It won't do you any good_. Rai only scoffed. Even a two-year old knew that the past was important.

But, well...a "past life" wasn't technically the only conclusion. It was just the only one he was willing to accept. Even accepting that one was difficult, because he then also had to also accept unprovable concepts such as the idea of a soul being reborn, possibly multiple times. In different worlds, no less. And the other options, which included the possibilities of Rai being absolutely crazy, were not pleasant to think about.

There _had_ been one other possibility which he had actually considered for some years, though. This was the idea that Father or another member of Cruxis had implanted such false memories into Rai's brain permanently (though he was unsure that it was possible) using magitechnology or some other art. But there was one thing he had eventually remembered which was so astonishing and ridiculous, he had been quite convinced that maybe he really was quite mad.

And that was the existence of a certain _screen_ in the other world - a 'television' screen to be more exact - it had taken him years to finally remember those two terms -  
A screen which had displayed a story, one that Rai had been able to indirectly influence by holding some kind of device that allowed him to remotely take control of characters inside the screen.

And not only that, but the characters inside the screen - and the world they lived in - were both very familiar. In fact, it seemed it had been the same world Rai was living in now.

Which was completely impossible. (Or so Rai had thought, but now he was starting to believe it; so far events occuring in real life - this life - matched exactly his memories of that simulation, if that was what it had been - )

And that was when he'd realized that if he didn't go with a certain conclusion for the sake of peace of mind, he probably would go mad after all. So he'd decided he'd go with the theory that these were memories of a previous life, and that screen had showed this world and what would happen in it, and that it was accurate.  
He'd stick with that until and unless it was somehow disproved.

Then, under the assumption that what had occurred in that simulation would accurately predict what would happen in Rai's life now, there were certain things he knew.

The problem was, he only had limited memories of his...previous life...although it seemed that they slowly increased. Rai had theorized that as he grew up, more and more memories were unlocked - since he was fourteen now, he thought he vaguely remembered what had happened up until the age of fourteen in that other world. This meant there were many things that he still didn't know.

However, one of the earliest things he had deduced was who Father was. More precisely - he could identify one of the characters in that simulation to have been Father.

And through more deduction, he had realized that the unknown organization he had been raised in was none other than Cruxis, the very organization that kept this false system of regeneration going to keep the balance between the two worlds. ...If his memories were to be believed.

He remembered the story as the characters had embarked on the Journey of Regeneration - the very Journey that would soon be starting - and could remember most of the details all the way up to the Tower of Salvation. He remembered the group discovering Tethe'alla, realizing there that Cruxis was not quite so benevolent as it seemed, and then almost being killed until they were rescued by a group of people that seemed to be Desians but weren't (but for the life of him Rai couldn't seem to remember what they had been called). After that, he remembered next to nothing. Yet.

Something from the little Rai did remember, though, was that the group had eventually traveled to Tethe'alla. And more importantly, he remembered the leader of Cruxis.

Mithos.

Mithos "the Hero", as Genis had earlier termed him in class.

It was one of the things that his mind refused to forget, although without knowledge of the rest of the journey, some of it seemed nonsensical.

It seemed Mithos the Hero was not only a half-elf (imagine that), but also now the leader of Cruxis. And mastermind of a scheme that would make everyone the same. A scheme meant to eliminate discrimination.

More interestingly, Rai could identify with that point of view. That was a little strange to him, considering that Mithos had been the enemy, was the enemy, considering what he was doing by stopping the development of magitechnology and knowledge. This, Rai definitely objected to - how could someone even think of sabotaging the advancement of science like that...?

And so Rai had endeavored that he would arrange for himself to go along on the Journey. Both so he could see if his theory about his memories was true and also so he could pull some strings. And to possibly find out the details of Mithos's plan. And because he didn't particularly want to sit around in Iselia for the next few years and wait around, wondering if it had really gone the way it was supposed to.

Not only that - he had another theory. Since he himself had not existed in the simulation as he remembered it, his mere presence could change things. At the very least he should go on the Journey - that way he would have the ability to at least try to steer things in the right direction, whatever he deemed that direction to be. At any rate, staying behind in Iselia would not be particularly helpful. And the world being destroyed wasn't a desirable outcome, since that would of course result in Rai's death.

It was with this in mind that he had gotten himself exiled from the village - it paved the way to his first plan to get himself taken along on the journey.

Rai sighed and lay back in the grass, blinking up at the treetops. Sometimes his mind felt so abuzz with activity that he wished he could just...turn it off temporarily, have a moment of peace. Having pondered Mithos a few minutes ago, some part of his thoughts couldn't help to return to that, wondering about Mithos's motivations and what made them so bad. After all, it seemed like maybe Mithos could be reasoned with, despite probably being insane. All he wanted was a world free of discrimination and to have his sister back - if Rai could come up with a way to achieve those goals without this accursed cycle of Regeneration...

Still, the age of lifeless beings didn't sound _entirely_ bad - if you were the one leading it, and didn't become lifeless yourself. There was something to be said for being assured in your knowledge of how the world worked, being able to predict any outcome, being perfectly in control.

Rai grinned suddenly. ...Yes, this journey might turn out to be a lot of fun after all.

* * *

When Raine cautiously entered the clearing where she had agreed to meet Rai, her adopted brother was reclining against a large tree, his eyes closed and his breathing relaxed. She heard the subtle change in its cadence and knew that he had sensed her presence, and a moment later he spoke.

"So you've arrived. Please, feel free to have a seat. I'm sure you have much to ask me." It was a thinly veiled jab at her suspicions concerning his motives, and they both knew it.

She strode forward and folded her legs under her so that she was seated beside him in front of the tall oak. He seemed utterly relaxed, almost as if asleep, his long legs stretched out in front of him and his head tipped back. He was dressed in his usual sleeveless black half-shirt, which exposed the pale skin of his navel. She had yet to find out why he dressed in such an unorthodox way, but she found it hard to believe that he didn't have a reason. This was Rai she was talking about, after all.  
After waiting in silence for a time, it became clear that Rai was not going to say anything more, so she asked quietly, "Are you all right?"

Rai finally opened his eyes, and she was only half surprised to see them flash with something between amusement and annoyance. "Do you really care?" he asked. Although his tone was derisive, there was something more to it - as if at least a part of him honestly wanted to know.

"Of course I do," she responded, although she knew he wouldn't believe her. She kept her own annoyance out of her tone. By taking this avenue, he had neatly evaded her next move; there was no way she could reasonably ask about his possible ulterior motives for saving Genis now, not without being accused - and rightfully so - of favoritism. She had no choice but to move on. "What did you wish to discuss?"

An odd look passed across her brother's face for a moment. She wasn't sure if it was hurt, confusion, or apprehension; possibly a mixture of the three, but before she could decide, the lapse was over and his gaze was as inscrutable as always. "It concerns the Journey of Regeneration," he said finally.

She studied him, not giving him a response, and after a few more moments of silence he continued.

"Although I am aware this was almost certainly not in the original plan, it makes the most logical sense for Lloyd, Genis, and I to come along on the Journey." There was a faint note of defeat in his tone, so subtle that Raine would not have noticed but for her already aroused suspicion.

"Because it would be safer than being on your own, without the protection of the village," she finished for him. Then, before she could stop herself, she added, "So _this_ is why you - "

The faintest of smiles graced Rai's face. "Of course you, with your intellect, would have noticed. Yes, my dear sister, you are correct. I planned to be exiled for this very reason - I wished from the beginning to come along on the Journey. I wouldn't be admitting this now but for a simple fact: your knowing my reasoning is not grounds to leave me behind, naturally."

"Of course." She sighed and leaned back against the tree. So he'd planned to come along on the Journey, but she doubted he'd give away his reasons.

After a short pause, she added, "You haven't fooled me, though. I know that wasn't your only reason for doing it. You wanted to spare Genis."

He looked taken aback for a moment, and as she had expected, a slightly defensive look flashed across his face before his expression was wiped clean. He smiled again and raised both palms in surrender. "You've caught me. Who could blame me, wanting to save my cute little brother?"

Raine narrowed her eyes at him. She knew, from the way he was trying to conceal his expression, that he didn't really believe what he was saying. Yet she also believed that he truly did care about Genis. Was it that he refused to admit that even to himself, and yet wanted her to think the opposite?

These mind games got tiring sometimes, she conceded, even when played with her little brother. He was admittedly quite brilliant, at least as much as she'd been at his age, but was also certainly lacking in the emotional department.

Rai's voice broke into her thoughts. "Continue staring at me that way and I might think you suspect me of something," he said lightly, jokingly. She wondered why he bothered to keep up the pretense when he knew that she knew _he_ knew they were both pretending.

She laughed. "Far from it, of course. So was that all you wanted to talk about? I see your point about the Journey, of course. You and Lloyd have been banished, and due to your half-elf status you may be targeted by the Desians. As for Genis, he would likely be in danger if he stayed because the villagers have only been temporarily dissuaded; it is likely he will still face some difficulty, and if his identity is exposed more definitely he might be exiled as well, on his own this time."

Rai was smiling again. "Precisely. I wonder at how easily you mirror my thoughts, sister. I would add to that the fact that Genis is an accomplished mage - more so than myself, in all honesty. It is actually likely that I will need more protection than Genis." She didn't miss the slight, bitter edge to his voice here.

"That may be true," she conceded. "So is there anything else you wished to confide in me?"

"There is." Rai's expression turned serious. "I plan to obtain some exspheres from the Desian ranch by posing as a Desian. They will aid us greatly in fighting. I have already mentioned it to Lloyd; he can convince Dirk to make some key crests for safer use."

Raine felt a jolt of surprise. This she had not expected. "It's unlike you to do something so dangerous. What exactly are the capabilities of these exspheres? And how do you know of them?"

Rai actually laughed, to her chagrin. "I'm sorry, it's just that I completely forgot I hadn't mentioned it to you before. I heard about them from...Dirk, but you may also have noticed that Lloyd has one; it's the gem on his hand, although he tries to keep it covered up. At any rate, although I don't know too much about them - "

Did she hear a hint of sarcasm in his voice, or was her mind playing tricks on her?

" - I do know they are gems that grant their wearer certain powers - or that is to say, they bring out one's innate power. To put it simply, they appear to ease the flow of mana through one's body, so that spellcasters' magic becomes stronger and even humans obtain the ability to use their own mana in a limited way. That is why Lloyd is able to pull off such impossible-looking sword techniques and jumps."

Despite herself, Raine was fascinated. "I see. I would certainly like to study them more. And the key crests you mentioned?"

"Well, as you might imagine, something so useful comes with a price. If an exsphere is equipped on the naked skin without any control mechanism, it eventually pulls one's mana out of equilibrium and ends up destabilizing it. You can imagine the result."

Raine shuddered. If Rai was right, such warping of a body's mana would be devastating. Survival for a sustained time would be difficult, and certainly the physical equilibrium would become warped in a way analogous to the mana. "...In short, one would become a monster..."

She hadn't realized she'd spoken aloud until Rai replied. "Exactly. That's why it's so important to use a key crest to tailor the exsphere, control it so that it meshes properly with the body's mana. Dirk is able to create these with the proper materials. However, I mean to try to find exspheres already equipped with key crests, if possible. Dirk's skills will be a last resort."

She found herself nodding as he spoke. "That is certainly wise. I probably should warn you against going, but on the contrary, I must ask..." Her cheeks colored at his knowing grin, but she plunged on: "...will you find one for me as well?"

* * *

The imposing structure of the Desian human ranch loomed far up, its sharp edges cutting the sun's arc neatly in half. Its construction was analogous to its dark purpose - menacing, gloomy, and composed of heavy grey brick.

Rai hated the sight of it, but not for the reason most villagers probably would. He hated it for being a pawn of an organization, in place only to propagate an endless pendulum of decline and ascendance. He hated it for deceiving well-meaning half-elves into gambling away their lives for, in the greater scheme of things, absolutely nothing at all. And yet he relished what he was about to do now.

Not only would it be a good mental exercise in acting and quick thinking, but it would also serve as a good opportunity to gather more information about the Desians, both to obtain new facts and to confirm those he knew from his memories. In fact, the promise of incoming information was almost seductive enough to wrench his mind away from his encounter with Raine earlier that day - almost.

Raine. He realized his fists had clenched without his realizing it and forced himself to relax. She was too smart for his liking. Genis was intelligent, sure, but certainly not a huge threat to anything Rai was planning - not yet, at least. But his older sister was a whole different matter.

Remembering the way her sharp eyes had seemed to pierce into him still made him prickle with unease. Why did she seem to be able to read him so easily? Not only that, but she had easily outmaneuvered him throughout their conversation. Never had she made a single misstep - it was always Rai who had to laugh and joke to cover up his unease, always Rai who had to direct the conversation away from his weaknesses.

Thinking about it was causing the familiar anger to bubble up again. Rai forcibly quashed it down, ignoring the snide voice snickering at the back of his mind, and directed his mind back to the ranch and his mission. He needed to pull this off perfectly, both to achieve his goal as efficiently as possible and to prove to himself that he was still capable.

_That's assuming you can_ , said the voice. Rai ignored it.

A few minutes later he had snagged a disguise by assaulting an unsuspecting Desian on patrol. Although Rai was only two years older than Genis, he was taller, having already reached about the same height as Lloyd. This meant that despite still being considerably short for a male, it hadn't been too difficult to find a Desian about his height. The clothes were ill-fitting, but not suspiciously so.

He had reluctantly left his usual clothing behind a boulder. He would have to be careful in the Desian uniform; his magic could be weakened. He'd found that it was easier to channel his magic with as much of his upper body exposed as possible. Since he called upon his magic from the mana core in his chest, it was much easier to manipulate and unleash that power without all the layers of cloth in the way.

Now that he came to think of it, though, the difference in power would likely be relatively minimal now. When he had first dabbled in magic, it had made a significant difference, but now that he was more practiced he doubted it would be a problem. Still, he had gotten into the habit of his usual clothes; this uniform felt fairly stifling in comparison.

He was jerked out of his thoughts by a voice and realized that he'd reached the entrance to the ranch. "Returning from patrol?" the Desian asked, sounding friendly. Rai kept his surprise from showing on his face. It was the same man who had escorted Genis back to the village. At least, he thought it was, judging from the voice and what little of his face was visible.

"Do you happen to know what time it is?" he asked, avoiding the question. He faked a yawn and added, "I may have lost track..."

"It's a couple of hours until sunrise," the Desian supplied, then glanced at him curiously. "I haven't seen you before...new recruit?"

"Yeah, I guess you can say that. You've heard of the transfers recently, right?" It was a bit of a shot in the dark, but one he could easily talk his way out of if need be.

The Desian's face brightened. "I have, actually. From the Asgard Ranch, huh? Well, we could certainly need the extra help."

"Yeah, so I heard. Tough time, huh?" Rai made his expression commiserating.

The Desian shook his head. "You have no idea. Lord Forcystus is really cracking down lately." He looked around and lowered his voice slightly. "Ever heard of the Angelus Project?"

Rai tried to hide his interest. "Has something to do with making a stronger exsphere of some sort, am I right?"

"Yeah, that's it. What most don't know is that it was here that the prototype for it was lost. A female host body made away with it, and then, well, there was a huge scandal..." He sounded slightly nervous. "Anyway, it seems like Lord Forcystus got some sort of tip-off about it, because he seems to think somebody in Iselia has it. You know what happens next..."

A tip-off? Was this supposed to happen? Rai pushed away his disquiet and replied, "So the reinforcements are to comb Iselia for the exsphere, then?"

"Yeah, well...if we don't find it, the village probably won't fare well. Of course, we can't destroy it entirely with our current quotas, but..."

"Makes sense." Rai paused. "When do you think we'll be doing the raid, then?" he asked casually. "I'm curious to see Iselia."

"Probably not until next week," the Desian admitted in a low voice, "because we're busy with the... _you know_."

_No, I don't know_. "Ah - right, how could I forget," he said lightly. "By the way, may I ask your name?"

"Ah, sorry! Forgot my manners for a moment!" The Desian chuckled and held out his hand. "I'm Alai. You?"

"Yuu," he lied, taking Alai's hand firmly. "Short for Yuusuke. At any rate, sorry to cut you off, but I really should be reporting...ah, and could you tell me where the equipment room is?"

As he walked further into the ranch, footsteps echoing in the near-silence, he saw very few Desians awake. He'd gotten enough information for now, anyway - better find the stock room and hope there would be some key crests there. He hadn't dared ask directly for what he was looking for, lest Alai become suspicious.

To his relief, when he entered the supply room using the card he'd filched from the Desian outside, he found that not only was there no additional security (understandably, since there wasn't much of that much importance) but that there were four or five key crests along with a stock of exspheres tucked into a back corner. He swiped a good number of them into a front pocket and turned to leave, his mind now on what Alai had said earlier. Iselia would be harassed for the sake of finding Lloyd's exsphere - but it couldn't be found, as both Lloyd and the exsphere would be long gone by that time if it was true that the 'raid' wouldn't be until next week. They would be leaving the day after tomorrow, most likely. The Desian had implied that the village might be attacked if the jewel wasn't found...

He frowned in annoyance. He knew that most other people would feel like they had to help, or somehow warn the village, but there wasn't really much he could do short of turning in Lloyd or having him give up the exsphere, both of which were out of the question. Would it really matter that much if he just left Iselia to its fate? Alai had even specifically mentioned that because of the quotas they wouldn't be able to outright destroy the village. Iselia hadn't broken the non-aggression treaty this time, after all. It shouldn't affect the Journey of Regeneration, and since Dirk lived outside of the village he likely wouldn't be affected either - not to mention that he was a dwarf and could probably escape to one of the underground cities if he really needed to. Even if he tried to warn the villagers, they probably wouldn't believe him - and assuming they somehow did, what could they even do against the Desians?

It was in his best interest to do nothing. So why did he feel so uneasy?


	6. The Day of Prophecy - Part One

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: The first scene may be disturbing for some readers. I did take care to make it non-graphic, but read at your own discretion.

_The room was dark and the fear as suffocating as the thick stench of cheap alcohol that permeated the air. Some combination of these factors paralyzed his limbs and it was as if he were wading through blood. Despite the frantic racing of his mind, he..._

_He let it happen, as he had countless times before._

_It was his fault..._

_No, it wasn't, it wasn't, he couldn't believe that, it couldn't be true...but he could no longer even remember why he had been so intent on believing that..._   
_As the golf club came down hard over his shoulder, something cracked and he barely bit back the involuntary whimper. If he made any noise, the situation would only worsen exponentially. This he knew from painful past experiences._

please  
no  
stop

_But as it always did, the sensations started to dull, like there was a disconnect between him and his body, like the boy being hurt was someone else, not him. He could almost imagine that this wasn't really happening. He no longer processed the monster's cursing and screaming, and nor was he keeping track of the unspeakable, but he was snapped out of his trance by a hard blow to the face that knocked him back several feet. His vision went white and red and the world spun so much that he barely knew which way was up. For a moment he forgot where he was._

_"Answer when I talk you, boy!" the man bellowed in heavily accented speech, and it was only then that the boy realized he must have been asked a question. The sudden dread made him sick. He was fairly certain of what the question had been, but he didn't need to guess; the man was now repeating it._

why did you kill your mother  
killed her  
all your fault  
murderer  
filth

_Words escaped him against his will. A broken sob. "I - I didn - "_

_The words died in his mouth as he collapsed under the ensuing blow, breathing heavily. No matter how much he just wanted this to, he wanted it to_ stopstopstop please no _-_

_But he couldn't bring himself to admit something like that, even to himself._

_...Especially...to himself..._

_"Wrong answer!"_

_"Please tell me the correct answer then, sir," the boy managed weakly. That earned him another blow, but the man answered him._

_"You hated her, hated that she loved me more than you, so you murdered her."_

murdered her

I'm only ten years old _, he wanted to protest._ I wasn't even there when she died _. But he didn't dare._

_Fury like never before filled him. It was a welcome respite from the horrified resignation and self-loathing he usually knew. This was wrong, what this man was doing was wrong, and the boy_ hated _him for it. He wanted the man gone, he wasn't even a man, just an animal, just filth that deserved to die -_

_The resolution was empowering, different from the helplessness of being beaten and accused. The man turned to leave -_

Either I'll die or he will.

_the club dropping from his hand -_

I don't care if it's both of us

_reaching for a bottle of beer on the shelf -_

DIE

_Screaming, screaming. The boy didn't know who, maybe it was him, in his mind, or out loud, or the man-animal was screaming, or it was just everybody. But the warm red on his hands was real, it was spread all over, and the screaming was gone now, the beast was finally quiet_

gone  
dead  
where he can't feel pain anymore...

_The boy realized finally what he had done wrong._

_Non-violence - holding back? It was utter_ bullshit _, he thought as he repeatedly drove the end of the club into the beast's skull, that would only get you killed. Killing? Stupid as well, then they couldn't even feel any of the pain they deserved, what was the point? Giving them an out?_

_What a failure he really was._

_The animal was a bloody mess on the floor now. Just a broken corpse, nothing more. The skull bashed in so horribly that its contents were visible._

_This was what had been allowed to hurt him._

_He had to be better than this. He had to be_ perfect _, figure out the key to get people do what he wanted._

_Only then could he put his enemies in the worst thing of all -_ a living hell.

* * *

The necklace lay on the table, finally completed. Lloyd let out a sigh of relief, glancing at the rays of early morning sun filtering through his window. He'd finished it in time for Colette's birthday; now he just had to give it to her, although it was less of an emergency now. After all, he knew for sure he was going along with her on the Journey. Surprisingly, it had been Rai who had convinced the Professor to let him come along. Although the half-elf hadn't mentioned why, Lloyd couldn't help but be grateful; he'd hardly stood a chance at convincing her on his own.

Wrapping the necklace in a clean cloth and tucking it safely into a pocket, he turned and glanced at the younger boy. Although Lloyd had offered the bed, Rai had insisted on sleeping on the floor. He was propped against the wall, but even in sleep his pale face was drawn and his arms crossed, resting in his lap. Lloyd wondered at the fact that he didn't seem cold at all; he'd refused any blankets, and his short black half-top certainly didn't do much to cover his skin.

As he was about to turn away, he paused at the sound of Rai's voice.

"...'s not my fault," the young boy muttered, so quietly that Lloyd almost missed it. He leaned forward, a little concerned. If it was a dream, it didn't sound very pleasant. Rai was quiet for some time, but his expression was troubled; he looked half like he was about to cry and half furious. It was the most emotion Lloyd had ever seen on his face.

Then Rai was screaming, so loudly that Lloyd could feel his own heart speeding in a startled thrum. He reached out to wake the half-elf, hand shaking slightly. Before he could, though, Rai jerked into a sitting position, his hands pressed tightly against his pointed ears.

Then he was fully awake.

Lloyd wasn't sure, but he thought maybe those green eyes were somewhat wet.

The expression was gone in an instant, though, and Rai was staring at him. He looked even blanker than usual, if that was possible. Then he said in a flat voice, "Sorry if I disturbed you. It's not appropriate of me after you were kind enough to lend me a place to sleep."

"Ah - no -" Lloyd held up his hands, half embarrassed to have been listening and half worried about Rai's well-being. "I was awake already, don't worry about it. Are you okay?" _What am I supposed to do in this situation...?_

"I'm fine. Thank you for asking." Rai got to his feet. "I -"

A blinding flash of light cut him off. Lloyd blinked as the room came back into focus and realized dazedly that it must be time for the Oracle. All thoughts of Rai were swept out of his mind.

Colette. He had to get to Colette and be with her for this! He grabbed his swords and dashed down the stairs.

Rai caught up with him outside, scowling and attempting to flatten his disheveled hair.

As they raced towards Iselia, Lloyd couldn't quite identify what he was feeling. Excitement and nervousness in equal parts, but also an odd sense of foreboding. He quickened his pace, ignoring Rai's annoyed exclamation. Rai was keeping up well; Lloyd hadn't realized how fast he was.

After finding out from the guards at the gate that the Chosen had already departed for the temple, they set off towards the back gate. Genis ran up as they went. "Lloyd, Rai! Are you guys going to the temple? Raine wouldn't let me come!"

Lloyd opened his mouth, but Rai beat him to it, voice sharp. "You might as well come, Genis," he said, "but hurry up. We might miss what's going on."

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Lloyd wondered why Rai was in such a hurry to get to the temple. But then, he had always been one for learning new things; maybe he just wanted to see what went on in the Oracle.

The three boys rushed out of the village, but had only gotten halfway to the temple before Lloyd realized that something was wrong. The definite noise of clashing swords was coming from the temple. His heart quickened with foreboding. As he started to voice as much to the other two, a sharp warning from Genis cut him off and he turned to face the large wolf bearing down on him. Two more wolves were leaping towards Rai and Genis.

As the one facing him snarled and went for his throat, he dispatched it with his sword as quickly as he could and turned to help the other two. He realized then that they were already dead; the Sage siblings must be more capable with magic than he had thought. He had seen neither of them cast for years.

After fending off more monsters, they finally made it to the temple and stared up the steps. Nothing looked amiss so far, but the sound of battle was obvious. "What the hell is going on here?" he wondered aloud. Before either of the others could respond, a priest came into view above. Lloyd raised a hand, about to call out to him, but his breath caught in his throat. Blood stained the pastor's white garb, spreading out from his chest, and as he struggled to make it down the steps, he lost his balance and toppled down. Lloyd rushed forward to help, heart sinking in horror, but wasn't able to get there in time to break his fall. "Pastor! Are you all right?"

Beside him, Genis stared into the man's face with tears in his eyes. "Lloyd, I think he's..."

Rai's voice cut in. "He's dead. There's nothing we can do for him now, but we should go see what's going on up there."

Lloyd felt the familiar stab of indignance at the utter indifference in Rai's voice, but he had to admit he was right. He scrambled to his feet and then, as an afterthought, turned halfheartedly to Genis. "You should stay down here - it's dangerous ..."

Genis was already cutting in, just as Lloyd had expected him to. "I care about Colette and everyone just as much as you, Lloyd! ...Besides, I can take care of myself."

"Don't get cocky," snapped Rai, "but at any rate, it would be foolish for us to split up at this point." He started up the steps. Lloyd opened his mouth angrily, but stopped when Genis caught his arm, shaking his head.

"He means well," he whispered, "and now isn't the time."

They reached the top of the steps, and Lloyd stared. It was worse than he'd thought. There was a full-out battle between what looked to be Desians and the people of the church - and it was obvious the Desians were winning. His knees felt weak with relief when he saw Colette standing in a corner with her grandmother, protected by a line of priests, though her eyes were worried and she looked as if she wanted to jump into the fray herself.

Beside him, Genis gasped in horror. "But - the non-aggression treaty - "

A tall Desian standing nearby turned to look at them. "Where is the Chosen?" he demanded, voice oddly accented.

Lloyd hardly heard him through the roaring in his ears. The noise of battle had faded away in the wake of the furious waves of fury crashing through him. These Desian bastards had not only killed his mother and kidnapped his best friend, but now they were attacking more people he loved - in violation of the treaty?! His whole body shook, and as he snarled and prepared to race into battle, he felt a surge of warmth from the exsphere on his hand. It was a bit idiotic, but he almost felt that somehow, through his mother's memento, her spirit was with him, urging him onward. He imagined that he could hear her warm voice, feel her embrace. _Be calm, Lloyd, my son. Do what you have to do._

Emboldened by the warm mana running through his body, he sprang forward. The tall leader leapt out of the way, so Lloyd sliced off the head of the Desian who had been next to him, parrying the blow from his companion and stabbing him through the chest. He barely registered the gasps of the Desians as they realized something had changed; he was running on pure adrenaline and mana, slashing and whirling almost on autopilot, his muscles responding easily from years of training with his father. Genis's faint call reached him and paused, confused, trying to clear the haze from his mind; he glanced around and realized that most of the Desians lay dead and that the leader seemed to have retreated. Of the priests who had been protecting Colette, only two were still standing, firm as ever. Before he could decide how he felt about any of this, he realized that straight ahead of him was an enormous warrior, wielding a vicious-looking ball-and-chain weapon larger than Lloyd's head.

He charged with a roar of fury, even as Rai yelled, "Don't just charge in, you idiot!", and raised his swords at the last moment to guard from a crushing blow. Somewhere behind him, Colette screamed as he was flung almost ten feet, somehow managing to land on his feet. His arms felt numb.

Glancing back at Rai and Genis, he saw that both were casting, but that would take some time yet - wait. Rai had already fired off his spell, faster than Lloyd would have thought possible. Unlike the spells Genis often used, Rai's magic seemed to blast outward straight from his hands as it took shape. He sent a wave of fire toward the giant, and then about five seconds later speared him with a sharp spike of ice alongside Genis's wind spell.

The most astonishing thing was that for the second one, Rai didn't seem to invoke a single incantation.

Lloyd didn't have much time to marvel at this, however. The large Desian, although now bleeding from many places, still seemed unnaturally steady on his feet and was now dealing out more devastating blows. Narrowly dodging what might have been a fatal blow to the head, he slid under another mighty swing, only to be flung back by a third hit. He tumbled over several times and managed to bring himself to his knees, using his swords to support him, and glared up at the Desian, who was now advancing towards him again with a cruel smirk on his face.

At some point Colette must have rushed forward, because she now stood by him, her chakrams clenched in her hands. "Colette, get back!" he yelled, voice rough. "You're the one they're after!"

She fixed him with a worried azure gaze. He felt a pang seeing the usual innocence in her eyes replaced by fear and something else he couldn't quite identify. "But Lloyd, you - "

"I'll be fine, Colette." He looked at her, trying to convey his desperation. "Please. We can't lose you."

She stared only a heartbeat longer before running to join Genis and Rai, who were still furiously casting. The two boys had managed to cast three or four more spells between them, and were now joined by Colette throwing her chakrams with practiced accuracy. Unfortunately, all this served only to slow down the giant, though he did seem to be starting to tire. His breath came in heaving pants and blood poured from his large gashes on his chest and arms, yet he was still grinning maniacally as he staggered closer to Lloyd, swinging his weapon around his head like a whip. Lloyd gritted his teeth and struggled to stand, willing his muscles to respond, but he couldn't seem to regain control of his legs. _Damn. This guy is tough._

He didn't want to show his weakness in front of his friends, but he could feel his mana running low, even with the help from his exsphere. Just as he was resigning himself to possible death - hopefully the others would be able to escape - there was a flash of purple in front of him and a loud clang as someone countered the giant's blow. Hardly daring to believe it, Lloyd looked up and saw a tall swordsman fending off the Desian with amazing dexterity.

He realized that the swordsman was now glancing back at him with annoyance in his amber eyes. He took a few paces back and extended his hand, yanking Lloyd to his feet. "Fight," the guy said shortly, after pausing to cast First Aid. Mana flooded back through Lloyd's body. At any other time, this man's arrogant tone would have annoyed him. Now he just nodded in thanks.

His frontal attack distracted the enemy, and the guy in purple used the chance to stab his sword through the giant's gut, moving insanely fast. Lloyd hadn't even been able to follow that with his eyes! Finally, the towering man collapsed, huge quantities of his blood seeping into the ground, and Lloyd knew he was dead.

Panting, he wiped his swords in the grass and looked around, trying to gauge the situation. The Desians all seemed to be either gone or dead, so he turned his gaze toward the newcomer. Phaidra, Colette's grandmother, had now come forward and was addressing the man. "You have my thanks for your help in aiding the Chosen."

She gestured to Colette, who had, along with Genis and Rai, come over to where they were standing. The man turned to look at them, his gaze calculating. "I see. So this girl is the next - " He paused, his eyes falling on Rai, and his gaze turned blank with shock. Lloyd glanced from him to Rai and saw that the half-elf was giving the man a furious glare.

He furrowed his brow for a moment, trying to figure out the odd tension between them, before that was driven out of his mind by something more important. He turned immediately to Colette. "Are you alright?" he muttered to her.

She turned to him, eyes glittering with some unnamed emotion. "Yes. Lloyd - I - thank you..."

The man now turned swiftly to Lloyd. "Your - your name is Lloyd?" He looked more shocked now, but covered it a second later. The expression was fleeting enough that Lloyd probably wouldn't have noticed it if he hadn't already seen the man's odd exchange with Rai. He wondered if there was something going on he didn't know about. Was there something odd about his name? Or had he just imagined the surprise...?

"Yeah. Yours?" he managed on autopilot, realizing he'd paused too long.

"I am Kratos, a mercenary. If you're amenable, I'll accept the job of guarding the Chosen." Kratos turned his head away and faced Phaidra again. Lloyd sneaked another glance at Rai and saw that although his gaze was still fixed on Kratos, it was now blank. The expression Rai had on now reminded Lloyd of how he'd looked earlier that morning, after he'd woken up screaming and seen Lloyd. What was that guy thinking?

He realized that while he'd been lost in thought, Phaidra must have agreed to Kratos, because she was now rasping, "The Chosen must make her way through the trials in the temple to the altar to receive the Oracle. Please accompany her."

Kratos nodded and began to walk toward the entrance, but Colette just gave Lloyd an uneasy glance. He immediately took a few paces forward and addressed Kratos. "Wait. I'm coming too. I want to protect Colette."

The man turned and gave him a condescending look that made his blood boil. "Lloyd, be a good boy and go home. It's far too dangerous for children."  
Lloyd opened his mouth to give a scathing retort, but before he could, Rai had stepped forward.

"Kratos, is it? I think you should know that Lloyd, Genis, and I will be coming along on the Journey of Regeneration," he said. Lloyd shivered at how empty the voice was. What was wrong with this guy? "Therefore, we may as well come along for this first trial. I understand that it may seem foolish to allow children to come along, but I assure you there are logical reasons for it. If you'd like to discuss them, you may do so later with Professor Raine, as time is currently running short."

Phaidra looked surprised - whether at Rai's manner or at his news Lloyd wasn't sure - but said nothing. Kratos and Rai simply stared at each other, expressions indecipherable, while everyone else looked on curiously. Lloyd could feel the tension in the air - these two had definitely met before.

Finally, Kratos turned away. "Hmph. As you wish. Just keep in mind that this isn't a field trip."


	7. The Day of Prophecy - Part Two

"Lloyd." Kratos's voice rumbled through the space, echoing in the main room of the temple. "Are your sword techniques self-taught?"

Rai sighed and found himself tuning out as Lloyd scratched the back of his neck sheepishly and replied in the affirmative. Due to his memories - and their tendency to constantly resurface in his dreams, despite his annoyance - he had many of the events of the simulation memorized, including the sequence with the Martel Temple. It was almost maddening to let the events play out in a way he was already familiar with - the utter boredom of it all - but he knew that he had to. Despite the tedium, it was still infinitely preferable to having events spiral out of control in a way he would be unable to predict. If things were changed, it should be done deliberately and for a purpose. He did wish he could simply change random variables just for the pleasure of seeing how things would change, but he didn't have that luxury; all evidence pointed to his current position not being a mere simulation. It was reasonable to assume he would only get one chance at it.

Still, he had surprised even himself with his flood of emotion earlier. He had known Father would show up, he'd even known the exact moment it would happen - but having it happen in real life was different than experiencing it in a memory where he'd had no emotional ties to someone who was, at the time, only a character.

His feelings had been mixed; confused, angry, betrayed, defensive. Knowing that Father...no, Kratos...had abandoned him with hardly a word as to why wasn't exactly conducive to being overjoyed at his reappearance. Even though he had a vague idea that Kratos had probably done it to protect Rai from the machinations of Cruxis, which he had since figured out was the organization he spent his early life in, he couldn't help feeling (irrationally, he thought in annoyance) that he'd been betrayed and abandoned.

What was more troubling was the reaction - rather, lack of reaction - Kratos had shown to him. He knew the man had recognized him - the shock had been proof enough - but he was obviously determined to ignore Rai, which was infuriating. Fine, maybe Kratos had had logical reasoning for abandoning Rai, but ignoring him when they finally encountered each other again was much less understandable. He had half a mind to reveal everything solely to upset whatever Kratos wanted to happen, but doing that without knowing more would be pretty stupid, not to mention petty and juvenile.

And then when Kratos saw Lloyd, his long-lost son (and supposedly Rai's half-brother, though Rai had yet to fully accept that), of course Rai would take the backseat...all when Lloyd didn't even know who his father was, nor had he spent any time with him. And Lloyd was nothing like Kratos!

Rai gritted his teeth, realizing how jealous and idiotic his own thoughts now sounded. Why should he care about Kratos's feelings toward or relationship with Lloyd? Regardless of whether Kratos was his father too, the fact remained that their tie had been all but severed. So why should it affect him this much? He needed to stop letting stupidly emotional aspects of his thoughts surface. He didn't need a parental figure; in fact, he was better off without one...

" - Rai? Rai!"

Startled, he realized Colette had probably been calling his name for some time; the group was now several paces ahead and was staring back at him. Genis had an odd look on his face, like he was trying to figure something out, and Kratos just looked impassive. Rai berated himself silently. Regardless of how boring things might get, he couldn't afford to continue to let his attention wander like this; it wasn't guaranteed that conversations and situations would go the way they had in his memories, after all. His mere existence had changed a lot of things, if only minimally so far, and furthermore his actions or even the most trivial comments he made could have far-reaching consequences. This much he knew from (he assumed, although the memories were hazy) his studies of time travel in his past life. He had to pay close attention to everything and document even minimal changes if he wanted to successfully manipulate the events or even have some semblance of control over them.

He realized he'd almost drifted off again and cursed under his breath. "Sorry. Carry on, I'm coming."

Lloyd, Colette, and Genis made as if to keep walking, but Kratos fixed him with a stare, one eyebrow raised. "If you wish to come with us, it would hardly be wise to lag behind the group. This temple is hardly free of danger and splitting up would be highly unwise."

White-hot fury flashed through him. Who did Kratos think he was? Does he think he can act like a parent after all this time? This time, he let none of his inner turmoil show on his face. "A valid point, although I fail to see its relevance," he replied a little icily as he rejoined the group, "since I was hardly planning to continue to 'lag behind', as you put it. I think I can be excused for being lost in thought for a moment, considering we obviously have yet to enter the dangerous part of the temple." He knew it had been a long and overly wordy response, but he felt it might be the best way to combat Kratos's equally formal and distant tone. Though maybe he had gone a bit overboard with the sarcastic wording.

Lloyd, for some reason, was staring at him open-mouthed. Rai ignored him. After a moment, Kratos seemed to decide it wasn't worth arguing about, because he simply turned and led the way down the hallway, deeper into the temple.

Still seething for reasons he didn't entirely like, Rai followed.

Presently they came to the magical barrier which blocked the way to the altar. A low buzzing sound could be heard, but it wasn't nearly as loud as Rai would have expected. Colette and Genis gasped and Lloyd exclaimed, "Whoa! That's so cool!" Rai snorted.

Lloyd unsheathed his swords, but Kratos held out a hand in front of him. "Wait. That won't help. The barrier appears to be electric; you'll only hurt yourself."

When Lloyd only looked confused, Rai couldn't help himself from stepping forward in exasperation. "Your sword is made of metal, so it would conduct the electricity if it touched it, idiot. In other words, you'd get electrocuted if you tried to breach the barrier using your swords. Clear enough?"

The confusion on the swordsman's face melted into annoyance. "Shut up," he grumbled. "...I - I knew that, I wasn't going to try that - "

Genis giggled. "Lloyd, you're such an idiot."

"Shut up, Genis!"

Deciding to ignore them, Rai turned so that everyone could see his face. "Since this is a trial, I assume there is some predetermined method by which we are expected to get past this barrier. Our first step, then, should be to explore the temple."

"...I concur," Kratos conceded. Genis was nodding as well.

"Yeah, makes sense."

The group made its way back to the main room, from which two corridors led off to either side. One appeared to be blocked by a landslide of rubble, so naturally they took the other path. It was rather narrow, so they traveled single-file, with Kratos in the lead and Colette behind him, followed by Genis, Rai, and finally Lloyd bringing up the rear in case of an ambush from behind.

Rai was looking forward to their next fight; he wanted to continue experimenting with using his magic in actual combat situations, particularly amidst party members. Using magic on his own was different for a number of reasons. Firstly, when training there was none of the chaos and pressure of a real fight, and secondly, in battle he had to learn to take into account the positions of his comrades to avoid getting them caught in the crossfire. He was trying to perfect firing spells off not only non-verbally but also with as little casting time as possible. It was best to block off everything else and focus only on the sensations of the spell and forming the required mana; however, unfortunately he couldn't afford to block off his surroundings completely in the middle of a battle in case he was targeted by an enemy. Therefore, he needed to find the correct balance, which still allowed him to use spells efficiently but didn't endanger his life.

Once he could achieve this, it would make him quite a formidable force in battle, Rai thought with grim satisfaction. Since he wouldn't need to verbalize his spells, the enemy would have no idea what he was casting until it was already upon them; not only that, but since he didn't need to mutter anything under his breath and kept his eyes open to watch for attacks, there was the potential to display little to no indication that he was casting at all. In the previous fight with Vidarr he had gone ahead and made it obvious, since Lloyd had been constantly glancing back at him, but once he had perfected his technique...

Lloyd's voice cut into his thoughts. "Rai! Above you!" He glanced up swiftly and his blood ran cold. A large spider, at least twice his size, was hurtling down on top of him. Shit shit shit. He had spent most of his time practicing his mental and mana-shaping capabilities, but little to no time on physical dexterity or fighting techniques. Even though his mind raced through several possible moves, he knew his muscles couldn't possibly react fast enough to execute any of them.

_God, you're fucking pathetic_. The voice rang clearly and loudly through his head, and before Rai even had the time to react with shock, suddenly a searing pain shot through him and he no longer had control of his own body. An alien-yet-not being had surged up from the depths of his mind and taken control of him; a moment later his body rolled to the side as the spider crashed down and the heel of his foot came forcefully down onto its abdomen in a pefectly timed axe kick. An...axe kick...?

He found himself suddenly engulfed in memory, memory of a time in which he had inhabited a different body. He felt himself moving, swiveling into various stances and fluidly executing various kicks, punches, and strikes. The only sound was the rustle of his crisp white uniform and the soft pat of his feet hitting the floor in controlled movement. As he completed the form, he heard a rough, pleased voice from behind him. "Well done, Akira. You were always one of my best students." As he turned to bow to his master, Rai felt a strange longing rip through his heart. It was as if he was being pulled painfully in two, towards a different time and place that no longer existed...

As the scene faded away into blackness, the pain that had seized him followed, ebbing away gradually. Slowly, the real world materialized around him. The first thing he realized was that he was slumped against Kratos, and that the group was all staring at him worriedly. The second was that he was in control of his own body again. He pushed himself up, staggered, and almost fell from the wave of sudden vertigo. Lloyd had made a movement as if to catch him, but Rai waved him away, hand pressed to his temple to combat the sudden onslaught of pain. It was as if his mind were being sawed in two.

As the discomfort subsided, he thought he heard the voice again, this time faint and somewhere buried in the back of his mind. _I refuse to accept you as being me, pathetic brat. Don't delude yourself into thinking those memories are yours. You were never Akira - Akira is me._

_Who - who are you?_ He couldn't help being shaken. He had always considered the many voices in his head to be his own, figments of his own imagination, but...this one was...

Akira? That was what the old man had called him in the memory. Rai's eyes widened in sudden realization. No, no...it couldn't be...

He wasn't able to ponder it any longer, though, as the rest of the group was still staring at him, Kratos with more than a little suspicion.

"Are you alright?" This was from Lloyd. For some reason, his worry only annoyed Rai, but he knew he should be grateful; Lloyd had saved him, after all.

"I'm fine," he muttered. "Thanks for warning me about the spider."

"No problem, but..." Lloyd looked uneasy. He wasn't the only one.

"What happened back there, Rai?" Genis murmured, expression tight. "You froze, but then you used some kind of move I've never seen. I had no idea you'd ever trained in any kind of physical combat. And then you just collapsed..."

Rai decided some measure of honesty would be best here. "I don't really know," he admitted. "I just reacted on automatic, and then for some reason became dizzy."

Kratos was eying him even more suspiciously now. "That was an advanced move," he said. "One that is characteristic of a certain martial art style taught only at a secret location. A master of the art must have taught it to you..."

Damn. He should have realized Kratos would pick up on something like that. After a pause during which he considered several replies, he settled for, "Is this really relevant? Also, I fail to see how my fighting style is any of your business."

Kratos snorted. "I can think of several reasons why it should be my business," he said in an annoyingly superior tone, "but let's drop the subject for now. We need to proceed, or this will take all day." Without waiting for a reply, he continued down the passageway toward the staircase now visible at the end of it.

As the rest of them followed, entering the wider area leading to the staircase, Genis and Lloyd muttered behind Rai.

"What is up with those two? You've noticed something weird too, right? You're close to Rai, you must have some idea..." It was Lloyd. Genis replied equally quietly.

"Look, he's really secretive, okay? He almost never discusses his thoughts, and I've never gotten him to talk about the time before he came to live with us. I don't really remember, but Raine said that when she first found him he said something about having been part of some top-secret organization. Maybe he knows Kratos from that time, and that's why they're pretending not to know each other?"

There was a silence. Rai felt a chill at how close to the mark his brother was. He hadn't known Raine had told Genis of his childish comments about Cruxis.

Then, "Yeah, that might be it. I'm kind of worried about him, though." There was another pause, and Rai itched to turn and see what they were doing.

Finally Lloyd said, even more quietly, "...Let's talk about this later."

Had they realized Rai might be able to hear them?

"Are you okay?" He started slightly and turned to look at Colette, who was looking at him with concern as they reached the bottom of the steps.

"I'm fine, thanks. Just...a bit tired from everything that's happened today, I suppose," he invented. She seemed unconvinced, but didn't press the subject. It occurred to him that she had been unusually quiet ever since they had entered the temple, but he pushed the thought away. He probably shouldn't meddle in the others' personal problems and risk screwing up the events even more.

As they walked forward onto a large platform suspended in the middle of the room, Rai noticed the square-shaped holes in the ground and remembered that they were supposed to push blocks through them to create a path down below. On a dais some distance away lay the Sorcerer's Ring. It was barely visible, being tiny in size, but the light emanating from it made its location easy to pinpoint.

"Ooh, look, what's that?" Lloyd was staring at the ring excitedly. Genis and Colette looked interested as well.

"It's impossible to tell from here," Kratos said, and Rai knew he was lying - how could he not be able to tell, with his angelic vision? "We should find a way to get closer," Kratos continued.

Rai stepped forward, closer to one of the square holes, and peered below. Despite himself, he was intrigued. Although he had seen all of this in the simulation, it was quite a bit different seeing it in real life.

_You're such a fucking idiot._ Rai stiffened, realizing the voice had returned. He had previously passed it off as just one of many, but he realized now that it was a great deal more intrusive than his other voices; they were constantly speaking, but he was usually able to tune them out until he needed their input.

_What do you mean?_ he ventured, deciding to ignore the foul language for now.

_Stop calling it a simulation. It's a game, dammit, a fucking game..._

Rai felt his eyes widen and had to consciously force his expression back to some semblance of normalcy.

_A...a game? What do you..._

_You'll probably remember soon enough, since you're getting access to more and more of my memories as time goes on. Seems like the speed is increasing exponentially, too... But I guess I'll just tell you. That "simulation" you keep referencing was actually just a game back on my home planet. It was called Tales of Symphonia, and as the player, I took control of the main character, Lloyd. Oh, and by the way, I didn't play that game until I was sixteen. You're wrong about that age thing._

_Wait. You keep referring to yourself as a separate person. Are you saying those aren't my memories...?_

The voice seemed to sigh, if that was even possible for an imaginary presence inside his head. _God, you're really clueless, aren't you? I keep forgetting...well, I guess you could consider yourself to be me - that is, we have the same soul, in a way. And, other than the fact that you're a half-elf and that your phenotype is quite different than mine, the majority of our genes are the same as well. But when I died, it seems that my soul was...cloned, I guess, and given a new, infant body. That cloned soul is you. I, the original soul, got brought along for the ride, since my original body was dead. That is, we were reborn._

_But...but why?_

_After I died, I had this weird experience_ \- He paused. _Hey, pay attention! We'll talk about this later._

Startled, Rai saw that they were now facing a behemoth of stone. Right, he remembered this from the simulation - no, _game_ \- they were supposed to defeat this monster, thus turning it into a block which they could then push down below. Lloyd and Kratos were already rushing forward to attack, but their swords only glanced uselessly off the hard body of the enemy. _I should have thought of this._ Of course it wouldn't work as smoothly as it did in the game. He glanced at Genis, who was studying the monster through narrowed eyes.

"Genis - let's freeze it. Maybe they can shatter it then."

His brother glanced at him in surprise, then nodded and began casting Icicle. Rai turned back to the monster and grasped his mana, feeling it turn cold and rigid, and after gathering enough, thrust it into the air so that it came plummeting down on top of the monster. A few seconds later Genis had cast his spell; he sent his mana low to the ground, so that ice spiked upward from beneath. Both spells encased the monster, one covering its head and torso and the other its legs, but it wasn't totally frozen, just hindered in his movements.

They ice spell after ice spell while Lloyd and Kratos pounded away and Colette stood around helplessly. Eventually Kratos used a mana-enhanced smashing attack with the flat of his blade, aiming for the frozen torso, and at long last the monster had crumbled into large pieces of stone. The group stood there, panting, hardly even able to relish their victory. Fighting a gargoyle certainly took a lot out of you; he could feel the definite drain in his mana just from this single fight.

_Don't tell me we have to fight more of these..._

Abandoning all decorum, Rai slapped his hand to his forehead and groaned loudly, ignoring the odd looks from the rest of the group.

* * *

As Colette stared up at the angel, she felt none of the expected reverence. She registered Genis's question behind her - _is he Colette's real father?_

There was no way that could be...No parent would send their daughter on a dangerous journey at the end of which lay only death.

...No, but that was exactly what her father back in the village, Frank, had done...

There was a choking feeling at the back of her throat. Somehow she swallowed it down and forced herself to continue looking up at the angel with a respectful expression. He was now speaking, cold gaze fixed on her in a way that made her legs turn to jelly.

"I am Remiel. I am an angel of judgement. I am here to guide Colette, daughter of the mana lineage, on her journey to heaven as the seventh Chosen."

...Journey to heaven. In other words, the end of her life. It was so obvious she felt like laughing hysterically. Did the others really not think the wording was a bit weird? She found herself hoping Lloyd hadn't picked up on it. But no...he never would. He would be too busy gawking at the angel's wings, she thought with a burst of fondness.

"The time has come," Remiel continued, "to awaken the Goddess Martel who sleeps at the center of the world."

He handed the Cruxis Crystal to Colette, and she accepted shakily, trying to hide her apprehension. As she'd been instructed, she lifted the gem and pressed it to her chest, just below the collarbone, and couldn't hold back the pained gasp that escaped her lips as it burned hotly into her flesh. Within seconds the sensation had ebbed from being almost unbearable to a dull pain. As her other senses returned to her, she realized Remiel was speaking again.

"...hereby bestow the Tower of Salvation upon Sylvarant."

She found that even as her friends gasped and talked excitedly, she couldn't bring herself to join them. Colette knew she should be happy on such a blessed day. She had received the Oracle, and had been accepted as Chosen, ready to start the regeneration of the world. But her limbs were heavy, and amongst all her worries, one thought took center stage. Could this man with the cold gaze and formal speech, who was entrusted with guiding her to her death, really be her father?

She wasn't sure which would be worse: his pretending to be her father, or his actually being her father and still sending her to die.

Her hand tightened around the gem at her neck. She noticed the wetness on her cheeks only when a tear made its way down to her chin. Hurriedly, she wiped away the evidence of her weakness and willed herself to become the Chosen again; the perfect, selfless, kind girl everyone wanted.  
Even as the mask formed and happiness lit up her face, she knew with a dreading certainty that the sad girl, the puppet, the coward, still existed somewhere within.


	8. Aftermath

 

"I accepted the job of guarding the Chosen, but I must ask - what is this I hear about children coming along?" Kratos fixed Raine with a narrow-eyed glance, arms crossed in front of his chest.

Genis jerked in surprise, then glanced at Raine too, curious about what she would say. He'd almost forgotten about what Rai had said earlier at the temple; he'd had no idea that there was any talk of them coming along. Lloyd hadn't seemed surprised, so obviously he'd been the only one in the dark. His fists clenched and he briefly thought back to that time at the temple.

The recollection reminded him of something else he had found strange at the time; the Desians they had fought had been different in appearance than the ones at the Iselia ranch. The details of their uniforms had been subtly different, something he probably wouldn't have noticed had he not been captured by Desians earlier. As he'd learned from spending time around Rai, even the smallest discrepancies are usually important. He couldn't help but wonder why nobody else seemed to have noticed this, instead immediately assuming that these were Desians from the Iselia ranch and were therefore breaking the treaty. He found it especially hard to believe that _Rai_ hadn't noticed - it was more likely he had, but for some reason hadn't mentioned it. He _had_ been acting pretty odd after that...

He looked up, pausing in his musings when he realized that his sister hadn't given a response yet.

Raine paused for some more time before answering, her gaze flitting uncharacteristically around the room where they were all gathered. It was the first floor of Colette's house, and everyone from the temple was present except for Lloyd and Rai, since they'd been banished from the village. Kratos was leaning against the far wall, and Raine sat next to Phaidra and Frank. Colette occupied her other side, looking unusually downcast. A fire crackled near where Genis sat on the floor, and the silence felt charged.

"The situation is complicated," Raine said finally. "Lloyd and Rai have been banished from the village, and it would be dangerous for them with both the hate from the villagers and a Desian ranch close by. Not only that, but knowing Lloyd, he would probably try to follow us anyway, and I'd rather he be with us rather than trying to travel through dangerous territory alone."

To Genis's surprise, Colette spoke up, her eyes troubled. "But...if Lloyd stays with Dirk..."

Genis couldn't help but interject. "Colette, don't you _want_ Lloyd to come along?"

She glanced at him, startled, then lowered her gaze, fisting her hands in the white cloth of her dress and biting her lip. Genis made a note to ask her later what was bothering her.

Kratos narrowed his eyes, and addressed Raine again. "What about your brother? It doesn't seem as if he's banished."

Genis gritted his teeth and stared at the floor. Kratos was right; he had no excuse to go along with them. Still, it rubbed him the wrong way how the man was talking about him like he wasn't even in the room.

"Genis has had some controversial accusations leveled at him, and has recently been involved in events regarding the Desian ranch which the villagers would rather forget," Raine murmured. "I don't feel safe leaving him alone in a suspicious, hostile village without even his friends by his side." Genis glanced up at his sister in surprise. He had expected her to argue for him to stay safely in the village...

Kratos looked unhappy, but grunted and turned his head to the side in concession. "That's your choice, I suppose. As long as the children don't get in the way of our objective..."

Raine glanced away from Kratos as well and addressed the room at large. "We have other things to discuss. Specifically, Colette, about your - "

She stopped in surprise as Colette suddenly stood up urgently. "Wait!" The blonde Chosen turned to Genis, who looked at her quizzically. Raine followed her gaze and seemed to come to some sort of understanding.

"Genis...I'm sorry, but could you leave us? There are some things..."

He felt a surge of annoyance. "Oh, right, the unavoidable important information that's too serious for a baby like me to hear. I completely forgot about it, sorry. I'll get out right away so you guys can get on with discussing adult matters." Even as he said it, he knew he sounded incredibly childish, but that did nothing to abate his anger.

Raine looked both shocked and resigned, but Genis didn't give her or anyone else a chance to respond as he stormed out of the house.

* * *

"I wonder what they're talking about?" Lloyd sighed for the sixth time. "I'm so - "

Rai opened his eyes and fixed him with a ferocious glare before he could finish his sentence. " _Yes_ , Lloyd, you're bored. I know. I heard you the last five times."

"How can you stand this, anyway?" Lloyd bit out, pacing back and forth and fingering his sword hilts. "Just being out here while the rest of them talk about the Journey?"

"You do know that if you hadn't insisted on getting yourself exiled you'd be over there with them?" That had come out a bit more derisively than he had intended...

Lloyd's eyes flashed angrily and he suddenly whirled around and punched the tree, narrowly missing Rai's head. "Okay, I'm tired of this. If you've got a problem with me, just come out and say it!" Somehow, Rai found himself backed against the tree trunk. They were practically nose to nose now, but Rai wasn't going to be the one to back down, startled as he was at the sudden intensity. He resisted the urge to avert his gaze.

"I'm not sure what you mean," he said slowly, trying to buy time with which to gauge the situation.

"Oh, you know exactly what I mean," Lloyd snarled. Rai half-expected to be grabbed by the collar and punched into oblivion at this rate. "But fine, I'll tell you anyway. I've been nothing but nice to you and you're just always making jabs at me! If I'm doing something you don't like, just say so!"

"I -" Rai, for once, wasn't sure what to say. Why was he always so annoyed around Lloyd? No, he knew why - it was because of his stupid emotional side, the side that rejected Lloyd as his half-brother, sharing the same father, and the side that resented how everyone always seemed to be on Lloyd's side even though Lloyd never made any sense. But he could hardly voice any of that. It would make him seem petty. _Maybe because you are_ , murmured a voice sadly in his mind. Rai ignored it, realizing that Lloyd was already continuing.

"And back at the village, I was _defending_ you! Although you don't seem to appreciate it - "

At this, Rai couldn't keep quiet. "Look, I get that your intentions were noble and everything, but that was definitely an idiotic move. It didn't achieve anything; those villagers were never going to listen. If you'd just kept quiet only one of us would be exiled instead of two - "

_"I'm not a fucking machine!"_ Lloyd snapped, so angrily that Rai was shocked into silence. This outburst seemed ridiculously out of character for Lloyd, even taking into consideration all the events of the game. He had no idea how to react, having never predicted this kind of situation. Maybe Lloyd had a point. Not everyone could be expected to act logically, but that didn't mean he should be _happy_ about that...ugh, what did Lloyd _want_ from him?

He could feel smugness emanating from the emotional corner of his mind, where that nagging voice resided. Elsewhere, Akira was snickering.

_Aww, are you getting all flustered, Rai? Are things getting a bit out of hand?_

_W-what?_ Despite himself, he felt blood rush to his cheeks and willed himself to regain control. _Shut up_. Maybe he should just be honest; he'd already been silent for too long. "You're right," he said finally, in a strangled sort of voice. "Sorry. There are actually some reasons I don't get along well with you, but it's not something I can tell you..." He felt sick. He couldn't remember the last time he'd _really_ apologized to anyone, and it wasn't a good feeling.

Lloyd was looking a bit calmer now, and slightly uncomfortable as he seemed to realize how out of control he'd been. He still looked irritated, but he leaned back, putting some distance between them, and let his hands drop. Rai let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding.

"So you're saying you hate me, but you can't say why." There was a hint of hurt in his voice now alongside the anger, and despite himself Rai felt like a bit of a jerk. He supposed it wasn't really Lloyd's fault that Kratos was his father, or that he was such an insufferable idiot whose every action went against Rai's philosophy of life...At the same time, he knew that most of this thinking was coming from that corner of his mind he was starting to call _W_. W for weak - emotional.

"I don't _hate_ you," he protested weakly. "Look, I - ... I'll try to be more civil from now on, okay?"

Lloyd sighed, the anger seeming to drain out of him. Now he just looked tired. He raised a hand to his hair and slumped against the tree next to Rai. "I guess that's all I can ask for. ...I'm sorry too, for lashing out at you like that..."

Rai felt a rush of relief that the moment was over. He was never comfortable in situations involving too many emotions. He searched for something to say in response, but another voice interrupted him.

"Were you guys fighting?" It was Genis, glancing between the two of them suspiciously as he walked over. Lloyd said nothing, so after a pause, Rai answered for him.

"...Not really. More importantly, what happened at the meeting?" Unsurprisingly, Genis's face twisted into a bitter expression.

"How would I know? I'm just a kid. I got sent away so they could discuss important, adult stuff not meant for my ears."

Rai sighed inwardly. He should have known Genis would have taken this harder than he did in the game, since this time he hadn't had Lloyd sent outside with him. "Did Raine tell them about us going on the Journey, though?" he prompted.

To his surprise, Geins's expression darkened even further. "Was it your idea, Rai? She did tell them, but it was news to me. You did say something about it outside the Martel Temple. Why did neither of you guys tell me about this?"

Great. He'd bet everything on Lloyd telling Genis, but it was starting to seem like he knew a lot less about Lloyd that he'd thought. "Genis, I'm sorry - since I was banished, I didn't get much of a chance to talk to you. I was the one who convinced Raine to let you come along as well."

Genis still looked unhappy, and he shot an irritated glance at Lloyd, but his blue eyes had softened slightly. "Fine, I guess..."

Something occurred to Rai. "Wait, Genis, I had something I wanted to give you..." He reached into his back pocket and pulled out one of the exspheres he had obtained from the ranch, complete with the key crest he had gotten fixed with Lloyd's help. He held it out to Genis, but instead of taking it, the young half-elf looked startled and then looked away, eyes shadowed.

"Actually, I already have one..." He pulled out a round exsphere, equipped with a key crest. Rai stared at him. How had Genis gotten both an exsphere and a key crest? He glanced at Lloyd just in time to see the swordsman give Genis a knowing look and his stomach clenched. Obviously, Lloyd knew the details, but it seemed Genis had failed to share some important information with Rai.

After a heavy silence during which Genis avoided his gaze, Rai said slowly, "Genis, can we talk? Lloyd, if you'd leave us alone for a bit?"

Lloyd looked at Genis. The younger half-elf nodded reluctantly, so the swordsman inclined his head and walked off in the direction of Dirk's house.

Rai placed his hands on Genis's shoulders firmly. "Genis, look at me." He tried to keep his voice soft, but to his dismay he saw when his brother finally turned to meet his gaze that his eyes were filled with tears.

"G-genis - " he stammered, but the younger boy only burst out sobbing. Rai's hands left Genis's shoulders and fell limply to his sides. Great. More damn emotions. Now what was he supposed to do? He refused to consult W for this.

_Hug him._

_W-what?!_

Akira sounded impatient now. _Look, I get that you aren't good with emotions. Neither was I, but I learned a few things while I was alive. Trust me on this. Your brother is crying, so you're supposed to comfort him._

_Damn. Here goes nothing, I suppose._ Awkwardly, he stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Genis's shoulders, pulling the other against him. His brother was significantly shorter, so this meant that his face was now buried in Rai's chest. Rai could feel his shirt becoming damp with tears as Genis hugged him back, still sobbing. He felt a flash of annoyance; how could he be expected to help if he had no idea what was going on? He had never understood why other people felt like crying about their problems was a good idea. It was ridiculously unproductive. _They don't do it to be productive, they just feel helpless,_ W whispered sadly. _Just like that time back then, when you_ -

_Don't you say another word,_ he snarled, and at the same time Akira started warningly, _Don't -_ but broke off as W retreated back to its corner with a resigned air. Rai wondered what Akira had been about to say, but his past self didn't offer any clues.

_W has a point, you know_ , Akira said after a pause. _Although I agree that it's pointless, you have to get that people aren't perfect. Sometimes they're going to take inefficient steps._ He paused, and somehow Rai could imagine him smirking. ... _By the way, don't you find it weird that you've got a voice in your head that you've named W? Or is that just me...?_

_You're a damn voice in my head, too,_ Rai shot back. He could tell Akira was going to continue, so he decided to beat him to the punch. _Shut up._

He realized he was still hugging Genis and that Genis was _still crying_. How long was this supposed to go on? He awkwardly patted him on the back, trying to get him to stop. Eventually the sobs quieted down and Genis pulled away slightly, sniffing and trying to rub the tears away. "I'm sorry. I know you don't like this sort of thing..."

"It's fine, don't worry. Just don't start crying again," Rai warned. "Now will you tell me what's wrong? It should help." _Probably. And why has he told Lloyd about it but not me?_

"I - I killed Marble..."

"Wh-what?"

He listened in shock as Genis blurted about his experience in the ranch and how Marble had supposedly been killed because of him. Inwardly, Rai sighed. This wasn't something someone as young and pure as Genis should have to experience. He wasn't sure why he felt so much older and more jaded than his brother, considering he was only two years older, but it was like something set him apart from this innocent child. He half-expected Akira to make a comment about his just being a brat too, but his past self was uncharacteristically silent. In fact, Rai thought he could feel something like apprehension from Akira, but he pushed the thought away in favor of the more pressing situation.

His first instinct was that it was indeed Genis's fault, or at least partially, because he really shouldn't have barged off to the ranch like that, but even Rai knew that it definitely wouldn't be a good idea to say so. Instead he said, hoping he sounded soothing, "Genis, it isn't your fault. Blame the Desians."

Genis's gaze snapped up to meet his so quickly that Rai almost stepped back. His brother's blue eyes were filled with frustration, and tears were beginning to leak out again. "That's exactly the problem," Genis said, voice trembling. "The...the Desians aren't all bad people. They just hate humans, but I can understand why because sometimes I - " He cut himself off with a choking sound and pressed both hands to his mouth as if he'd said something he hadn't meant to, more tears running down his cheeks.

Instantly Rai realized what the problem was. He berated himself for not having thought of it sooner, but he hadn't expected for Genis's thought process to have matured this much. "Genis, it's okay. I agree with you," he said quickly. His brother looked up at him in shock.

"B-but," he choked. Rai shushed him, putting a finger to his lips.

"Hear me out. I'm glad that you've made this realization. You're right, Genis. The Desians aren't all totally bad. Nothing is black and white, even though people tend to paint things that way for convenience. Humans hate all half-elves because of the actions of a few; the Desians do exactly the same thing. That doesn't make all of them bad - not _individually_." He paused, trying to gauge Genis's response, then continued, "I know what you were trying to say - sometimes you kind of agree that humans are kind of hateable, right?"

At Genis's guilt-stricken expression, he knew he'd hit the nail on the head. Rai sighed. "I'm the same way, okay. It's _normal_ , damn it. As long as you know that not all humans are necessarily scum just because some are, you're fine. I'll slap the idiocy out of you if you seem to be slipping too far, okay?"

That pulled a halfhearted laugh out of his brother. Emboldened, he continued, "At any rate, even though you can't blame individual Desians, as long as you believe Marble's death was wrong you have to admit that at least the system of the Desians is flawed. You can blame the system - the system and those at the top of it. If you want to avenge Marble, focus on changing that system - and whatever portion of the blame you might share, just make sure you learn from it so you don't make the same mistakes again." _Wow, that was surprisingly idealistic. Am I turning into Lloyd now? Well, whatever it takes to make him feel better, I suppose..._ Genis seemed to be listening intently, so he added, "Actually, on the topic of blame, I share some of it myself. If I hadn't been so harsh with you, you wouldn't have run off to the ranch in the first place."

"What? No, it's not your fault!"

Rai smirked a little. "That's exactly how you sound to me when you try to blame yourself. Do you get how ridiculous it is now?"

Genis blushed a little, but he was smiling. "I...thanks, Rai." Unexpectedly, he threw his arms around Rai again. "Sorry for making such a fuss," he mumbled into the cloth of his shirt.

Despite being slightly uncomfortable at the close proximity, Rai smiled as the first drops of rain began to fall.


End file.
